I'll Swim An Ocean for You Oli Sykes
by TheBeehive
Summary: OLI SYKES FANFIC :D
1. Chapter 1

Moving into a new place is hard for everyone. Leaving everything behind is worse and Natalie Sanders is no exception to that rule. Natalie had light brown eyes and a darker shade of brown for her hair. She had a slim figure that made boys in her old school literally drool. She spent her whole life in what you can call misery but with her I don't care attitude she carries around, it would seem as if nothing big ever happened in her life. Her father died when she was 13 and it almost tore her mother apart but after three whole years, she finally got herself back together and set her priorities straight and that was when Mrs. Sanders met another man. This man was from Sheffield in the United Kingdom and he and Natalie's mother planned to get married and move to Sheffield, away from Baltimore, Maryland. Their old house was still occupied by Natalie's aunt so that whenever Natalie felt like going back to America, she'd have a place to stay but knowing her mother, she'd tell Natalie exactly what she wanted and Natalie would have to do it even if she didn't want to. She didn't really have a choice when her mother decides on something.

Natalie's mother told her that she could only go back to Maryland if she has good grades in her new school and she could only return to her home land during summer and winter.

"Natalie, let's go," Natalie's mother shouted from downstairs. They were a very wealthy family and soon after they would be gone, Natalie's Aunt, Emily would be the only one living in their mansion.

"Why can't I just stay here?" Natalie said as she walked down the stairs.

"Let's just go, I'm tired of arguing with you," her mother muttered.

"I'm hopeless," Natalie said to herself as they both walked outside.

"All ready?" Mr. Collins asked with his English accent. The one and only thing that got her mother's attention, maybe his features are good enough for someone their age but why does he have to live so far away?

"Nope," Natalie said rather loudly.

"Natalie!" her mother scolded. She ignored it and plugged her earphones in her ears and ignored everything else around her. She got in the car that was going to take all of them to the airport and stared out the window.

She couldn't stand leaving everything behind but somehow, she couldn't let her mother go alone either.


	2. Chapter 2

[NATALIE'S POV]

I stayed in the car while the two of them were I guess talking about me at the back of the car. I didn't really care so I just stayed inside and listened to the music in my iPod.

We left after a while and I drifted off to sleep and woke up in the airport. I already texted everyone I was gonna miss and they all replied with the cliché "Don't go!" or something like that. But I couldn't tell them that I was never going to because my mother decides for me even if I'm already seventeen. Just one more year and I can be free so until then, I guess I'd have to put up with her shit and go to United Kingdom. For all I know, maybe it wouldn't be such a bad idea.

I sighed heavily as I passed through all the security stuff you have to go through in an airport. Once we boarded on the plane, I sat by the window even though I knew that it wasn't my place. It was Mr. Collins' which was exactly why I didn't care.

"Please excuse her," I heard my mother say as she sat beside me. I was looking out the window so I didn't really see what Mr. Collins did but again, I really don't give a damn.

We got off the plane after what seemed like forever. I was really pissed at my mother for falling in love with this stupid man who is a principal at this school but luckily, my mother told him to send me to a boarding school so that I could learn more about being independent but I don't think that's the real reason. Who knows what the hell she is going to do with that man while I'm gone and boy, I don't even want to think about it. After we left the airport, Mr. Collins' limousine picked us up and drove us to what looked like richville. It was the place for the rich people who could afford about a lot of things. My mother inherited a lot after her parents' deaths and also after my father's but she didn't spend it like this. I mean our house was big but this is like two times bigger. We moved all our stuff in and Collins told us all about how he got the house he lived in. Apparently, his job gives him a fortune and his parents were rich as well so there is really no doubt about how he got this mansion. He gave us a tour around and showed us every room. He showed me my room and it was a lot bigger and better than my old one but there is one thing that it doesn't and will never have and that thing is my memories. It can never take the place of the old four walls I used to live in.

"Natalie?" Mr. Collins said and I turned to look at him.

"Yes?" I said in the most polite and synthetic way yet.

"Your things will be placed in here by the helpers so come back later when it's all there so you can use this room right away but until then, your mother told me that you two should say hi to the neighbors." He said in that annoying English accent. Frankly, I think English accents are awesome but his is just messed up.

"Okay," I said walking out the door with only my phone and my iPod in my pocket. I walked down the winding stairs that had a lot of steps. This was a lot to get used to.

My mother was lounging on the couch as she waited for me to come down.

"Who shall we visit first?" She asked Mr. Collins once he too came down the stairs.

"I suggest we visit the Nicholls' first," he said and whispered something to my mother that made her smile. I swear, that was the creepiest thing yet.

"That would be a great idea, lets go then," she said and we all walked out the door.

We walked a long way before we got to the house which was in my point of view a bit smaller than ours but still big. When we rang the doorbell, a casual looking mother came out to greet us. I was thinking everyone would be dressing real fancy like Mr. Collins but apparently he was the only one.

"Why, hello there?" she said in an accent. I really should start getting used to those accents. It sounds real weird in my ears.

"Hello, Jenny," Mr. Collins greeted and started the introductions. She let us in and she introduced me to the rest of the family. The Nicholls family had four members. Parents and two sons and probably both are already in the adolescent stage.

"Natalie, meet Matt. He is I guess your age," Mrs. Nicholls said.

"Hi," I said and he stared me up and down. His mother smacked him and looked with anger upon him. She must've noticed.

"Oh, uh, Hello," he said rubbing the part where his mother slapped him.

I noticed what a decent looking house they had and complimented Matt's mother for it. I sighed as I sat down totally noticing that it would be a long day.


	3. Chapter 3

[MATT'S POV]

Well, well what do we have here? I never knew that Mr. Collins could score chicks like Mrs. Sanders. I mean for an old lady she's pretty fine. And the daughter? She looks like she was sent straight from heaven. But I don't think she's my type of girl. After the little introduction my mother made, I sat back on the couch and started texting on my phone. For some reason, Oli was the first person I could think of and since I didn't really want a crowded house today so I texted him only. He replied right away saying that he'd be here in ten minutes. He lives right down the block so I guess it won't take too long.

"Can I sit here?" Natalie said pointing to the space inches away from me.

"Sure," I said. She then sat down and plugged her iPod in her ears. She grabbed her phone and I guess started texting as well.

"Natalie!" Mrs. Sanders called from the kitchen. Natalie didn't say anything until I nudged her with my fist softly.

"What?" She said taking her earphones off.

"We're heading out to greet the rest of the people." Natalie's mother said.

"Can't I just stay in the house?" Natalie said with a voice that seemed annoyed.

"She can stay here," I said from out of the blue. She looked at me with thankful eyes and then turned back to look at her mother.

"Alright then, I'll go tell Jenny," Natalie's mother said and walked away.

"Thanks," she said sighing.

"No prob," I said. After that, we both stayed silent until her mother, Mr. Collins and my mother went out. She and I were the only ones left in the house. It wasn't long after the doorbell rang. I quickly stood up and opened it.

"Tell me why I'm here again." Oli said as soon as I opened the door.

"Come in and I'll show you," I said leading him to the living room where Natalie sat on the couch just looking at her phone. She only looked up when she noticed that I was in front of her with Oli by my side.

"Natalie, meet my friend Oli. Oli, meet the new next door neighbor, Natalie." I said.

"Hi," they both said at the same time.

"Excuse me for a while," I said looking at Oli who had the hugest grin yet.

"Sure," Oli said and I left for the kitchen.

[OLI'S POV]

One look at Natalie and bam! Everything fell right out of place. When her light brown eyes looked into mine, I swear, I thought I would fall apart right then and there. This might be a cliché type of thing but I bet other people would say the same thing if they saw Natalie.

I sat down beside her hoping that she wouldn't mind. I kinda felt uneasy about sitting there only centimeters away from her.

"So where you from?" I asked starting off a topic.

"I'm from Baltimore," She said.

"Maryland?" I asked.

"Is there any other?" she said sarcastically. Clearly, she wasn't in the mood.

"I guess not," I said.

"Sorry, it's just that…" she trailed off.

"Just what?" I said.

"I think I'm a getting a bit homesick." She said looking at me her eyes a bit teary.

"It's okay, I know how you feel." I said taking her hand. Luckily she didn't push it away.

"You do?" she said grasping my hand a bit tighter but not enough to hurt it.

"Yea, I lived in Australia for about five years then my parents migrated here. I really didn't want to go but I had no choice. I had a lot of friends in Australia and at that time I missed them terribly once I arrived here. I even remember crying in the airplane when we left. The stewardess even gave me a free toy just so I could shut up." I said and we both chuckled.

"I don't think I can actually just forget everything I left behind and just move on like you. There are too many memories back there in my hometown." She said leaning her head on my shoulder as she started to cry. I wrapped my arms around her and comforted her as she expressed how much she didn't want to be in this country. What she said kinda hurt me but I don't really care. I'll show her that she'll enjoy Sheffield and I'll do whatever I can just to make her happy again.


	4. Chapter 4

[NATALIE'S POV]

I couldn't really figure out why I acted like that in front of Oli. I don't know why I let him hold my hand and why I held it right back. Clearly, my mind's all messed up but for some reason being around him made me feel better. It's as if he was one of my oldest friends, one I trusted already but he couldn't be because I've never seen him in my entire life.

I stopped crying after a while as he wiped my tears away. We started to talk and know a bit more about each other. I noticed that he was a really nice guy and that he was sweet and everything. One weird thing was that I couldn't stop smiling whenever he looked at me. It's like instant happiness when I was with him.

"By the way, where's Matt?" I asked out of the blue.

"I don't really know. Probably he's texting his girlfriend or something," Oli said and we both got up.

"Oh okay," I said checking the time.

"You hungry?" he asked and I nodded.

We both went in to the kitchen and I sat on one of the chairs by the counter. I watched him as he raided the refrigerator.

"What are you doing?" Matt said coming in from the back door.

"Looking for something to eat," Oli said rummaging through the first few drawers.

"For you or for her?" Matt asked. Somehow, he seemed kinda pissed. I wasn't really sure about why but I sensed it from the way he was talking.

"Both," Oli said.

"Okay then move," he said pushing Oli out of the way and looking for some food. He took out the bread and the jam and some other spreads.

"Thanks," I told Matt as he left the room.

"Sure," he said without even turning around.

"What's up with him?" I asked Oli who was fixing a sandwich.

"Girl problems I guess," he said handing the sandwich to me.

"Thanks," I said smiling at him.

"Anyway," he said fixing another sandwich as I took a bite.

"What the hell is in here?" I asked with my mouth full

"You've never tried peanut butter and jelly?" he said surprised.

"No," I said. It tasted good to be honest.

"You've got to be kidding me," he said laughing.

"My mom never let me mix things together. She thinks that if I do, I might end up throwing it in the trash. This is pretty good," I said munching more of it.

"Well, thanks," he said biting into his.

I finished my sandwich and washed my hands. I wiped my hands on the towel and sat back on the chair as he made another one for him.

"So, do you go to school?" I asked knowing that the answer would be a definite yes.

"Yea," he said.

"Where?" I asked.

"I go to a boarding school. We're having a break off of school right now that's why I'm here." He said.

"My mom said that I'd be going to a boarding school too but I don't really know which one." I said.

"Maybe we'll see each other then," he said certain.

"But I don't even know where I'm going yet," I said.

"Obviously, we'd be attending the same school because it's the only school in this side of town." He said finishing his sandwich and drinking a bottle of water.

"Well, we never know maybe-"

"Let's just say that we're gonna be attending the same school," he said cutting me off as I smiled. After a moment of silence, he grabbed me by the hand and leaned in to kiss me.


	5. Chapter 5

[OLI'S POV]

I didn't really know what happened or why I ended up doing that. I guess I just went out on a limb and lost myself. I kissed her once and it ended up as a make out session which ended when we heard someone at the door. As soon as the door slammed, our lips parted and we quickly separated from each other. She hopped off the chair and went in to the living room where her parents lounged.

"Are you ready to see your new room?" Mrs. Sanders asked Natalie.

"I guess," she said turning to look at me. I gave her a smile and she returned it with her own. Mr. Collins looked my way and I gave him a nod as a greeting and he greeted me back. I never really liked Mr. Collins and with the way he was looking at me now, I don't think he liked me as well.

"Let's get going then," Mr. Collins said heading out the door.

I wanted to be with Natalie right now but I wouldn't want to make a bad impression so I looked for Matt who was probably in the basement banging to one of his favorite songs. I went down and opened the door. I saw him looking out the window which was kinda weird.

"What're you doing?" I asked him and he turned around abruptly.

"What the fuck man! You could've slammed the door when you came in to tell me that someone was here! You scared the shit out of me!" he said.

"Someone's in need of a tampon," I teased

"Shut the fuck up!" he said looking out the window once again. I walked towards him and I heard him sigh. I looked out the window and I still didn't get why he was doing it.

"What's out there?" I asked him.

"Nothing," he said sitting on the couch with one arm over his eyes.

"Dude, you can tell me what's wrong," I said standing in front of him.

"I know but I don't want too," he said and his tone kinda gave me a hunch about what the problem might be about.

"Is it about Natalie?" I asked in the smallest voice possible hoping I only murmured it to myself but apparently he heard me. He sighed and sat up.

"Maybe," he said looking at me through his narrowed eyes. I looked at him with shock on my face.

"You liked-"

"Bingo, genius!" he said getting up.

"Well you should've told me," I said.

"You are such an asshole!" he said walking out the door. I didn't really see why he was so angry I mean she was hot but didn't he have someone already? I asked myself that question and looked back at our little conversation. It only occurred to me now that I acted like a jerk. Man I'm slow!

I went up and tried to apologize but he wasn't there anymore.

"Hey Mrs. N, did you see where Matt went?" I asked his mother as soon as I got up from the basement.

"Oh, um I think he went in to his room but he told me not to disturb him," she said and I guess that was my cue to leave so I said thanks and I was on my way.

[MATT'S POV]

Well I should've seen that coming but I guess it was kinda pointless fighting over one girl whom he obviously likes already and vice versa. Probably Oli wouldn't get exactly why I'm mad since I told him I had someone already but in real life, I don't and I thought that she'd be the one for me but right now, I don't know anymore. Should I just let her go and let him take her? If I do, then I don't think she'd know what's ahead of her. Knowing Oli, I don't think they'd last. But then again if that happens then what will I be? The rebound? That's too embarrassing. I shook all those thoughts and tried to get them out of my head and tried to sleep on it. And slowly, I drifted away to my own world where I get everything my way.

[NATALIE'S POV]

Going in to my soon-to-be room somehow gave me a thrill. I don't know exactly why but I kinda felt excited. My mother was downstairs with Mr. Collins so I could get cozy quickly. When I opened the door, a jolt of happiness ran up and down my spine. It was like the best room I have ever seen. It was big and everything. All my stuff was placed where I hoped to put them and I guess my mother helped in the decoration of the room because everything looked so pretty which goes to show that my mother knew me well. I checked out everything that needed to be checked out in my room and loved about everything in my room.

After I checked everything out and started to get comfortable, I lay on my bed and started thinking about how much of a jerk I was treating Mr. Collins like shit. I got up and went down to thank him for my room and to apologize. Once I found him alone, I quickly took the opportunity.

"Mr. Collins?" I said and he turned back to look at me.

"Oh, hello Natalie," he said.

"I just wanted to say thank you for my room and to apologize for my unreasonable behavior towards you." I said looking at the floor and he was silent for a while. I looked up at him and saw him smile.

"That's fine, I'm glad you liked it and consider yourself forgiven," he said and he embraced me in a fatherly kind of way.

I think that was the first time he did that or the first time I let him embrace me. After that little conversation we had, I started to ask him questions that one part of me always wanted to ask him before but the other part of me always said not to. We bonded for quite a while and realized why my mother fell for Mr. Collins. He was a really nice guy and right now, I think that he'd make a great father.


	6. Chapter 6

Time passed rather quickly here in Sheffield. I started hanging out with Matt and Oli a lot. I went to band practice a lot but my parents wouldn't allow me to go to the show. Oh did I forget? My parents got married already in a big cathedral and they had quite a reception. A lot of people came and I met a lot of cool people.

Today, it was time for me to go to school. Today was my first day and I already had all my bags packed and it was all in the car.

"Remember to brush your teeth at night okay? And you can call me whenever you want to. I promise I'll pick it up." My mom said as I walked to the car. My dad was at work but he said goodbye last night.

"Mom, don't worry." I said reeling my iPod from my back pocket.

"Are you sure you want to go to a boarding school because you know, you can always go to another school. Your father can enroll you somewhere else." My mother said. Clearly, she was scared but she was the one who planned all this being –independent- by- going- to- a- boarding- school crap. Why did she have second thoughts now?

"Mom, I don't want to give him a hard time and plus, you were the one who enrolled me in that school saying that it'd be a good idea." I reminded her.

"I know but you know me. Natalie if you want to, you can switch school right this moment if you want to." My mother stated. She was getting shaky.

"Mom, I'll be home every now and then. You really don't have to worry." I said embracing her. She let go after a while and then I climbed in the car. I shut the door and plugged in my earphones and waved goodbye to her as the car left the premises.

It was a long ride to school and it was around eight in the morning. I really don't know what to expect from the school but I'm hoping nothing embarrassing happens on my first day.

I got to school at about 10:30 A.M. and there were a lot of people around. There were some students with parents and some with friends laughing and talking and probably catching up. I climbed out the car and grabbed my bags from the back of the car. But a bellboy or whatever he was beat me to it. I took my earphones out of my ear and put away my iPod as soon as he was in hearing distance.

"Where to, miss?" he asked.

"I'm not quite sure," I said and just then, the head mistress walked towards me.

"Well, I'm guessing you're Natalie Sanders," she said looking at the clipboard in front of her.

"Yes, I am," I said.

"She's in room 625," she told the bellboy and he instantly got my bags and went to my room.

"Welcome to our school," the head mistress said. She told me more things about the school and that if I had any questions, I was supposed to ask the head girl, Amber Harrington. She pointed her to me and from my point of view, she was what you can call ordinary and the usual teacher's pet. She didn't seem like a bitch or a slut.

"Um, I have just one question before anything else," I told Mrs. Darrington. Apparently, that was her name.

"What is it, dear?" she asked in her weirdly caring tone.

"Do I share my room with someone else?" I asked or muttered.

"As of right now, no but there is a tendency that you might," she said and I felt my stomach churn.

"Okay then, where can I claim my key?" I asked her pleasantly and hiding my fear.

"Oh right, I almost forgot. Here you go," she said reaching in to her pocket and handing me two keys.

"What's the other one for?" I asked.

"It's your spare key or if ever you get a roommate," she said

"Thanks," I said and I was on my way.

As I went through the halls at school, I received a lot of friendly hellos and noticed that they were all wearing a uniform that I did not know about. I found my way to my room by climbing up some stairs and turning to where the arrows were pointing. I got to my room and unlocked the door. When I opened it, I noticed that my bags were already on top of my bed. I unpacked quickly and placed everything right where they belonged. After I did everything there was to do, I heard a knock on my door. I quickly stood up to open it. It was just a maid delivering five sets of uniforms that fit me.

"You're class doesn't start until tomorrow," she informed me.

"Thanks," I said. She nodded and left. I put away my uniforms and shut the door. I was going to lie down on my bed when suddenly another knock was heard. I got up restlessly as I opened the door.

"Hey there," a guy said. He was wearing a uniform so obviously he was a student as well.

"Hi," I said letting him in. I don't know about you but he seemed kinda cute in a way.

"My name's Steven Asher." He introduced himself.

"Nice to meet you, I'm Natalie." I told him and we shook hands.

"I'm your next door neighbor so if you don't mind, I'll just stay in here for a while because my roommate needs some alone time." He explained.

"I guess you can stay. I have nothing else to do anyway," I said and that's kinda how I met him.


	7. Chapter 7

"If classes start tomorrow, why are you all wearing a uniform?" I asked him as I sat on the bed. He sat on the chair beside what I'm thinking is the study table.

"It's for display. You know, to tell everyone that there is a school uniform." He said.

"Well that's kinda stupid," I said putting my legs up so that I could sit like an Indian.

"Well, aren't we all a little stupid some times," he said in that little charming accent.

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked him and he just laughed.

He started asking me personal questions like where I'm from, what grade I was in, if I listened to music or not, what my favorite subject was, what kind of food I liked to it, he asked if I liked stuffed toys and candy and a lot more questions which I think I answered quite sincerely.

"Pardon my being nosy but do you happen to have a boyfriend?" he asked and I stayed silent.

"Yea, she does," Oli chimed in and I smiled brightly as I looked at him.

"Well I guess I should get going then. See you around Natalie," he said and walked out the door giving Oli a little nudge on the shoulder.

Oli walked towards me and ignored Steven's nudge with a grin on his face. The grin I have learned to love as the days went by.

"Told ya we'd be in the same school," he said giving me a kiss.

"Did you use to go here or did you just transfer?" I asked him as I closed the door.

"Let's just say I used my magic," he said pulling me close to him.

"Oh so you're a magician now?" I asked playfully as he lay me down on the bed.

"Yea and I can magically make you kiss me back after I do this," he said and he leaned down and kissed me and yes, I guess he did have magic. I smiled as I kissed him.

Just then, I heard a knock on the door and we both jumped up, startled and surprised. I stood up and opened the door.

"Miss Sanders, someone has sent you a package," the guy said handing me a box and an envelope.

"Who's this from?" I asked him.

"I don't know. My job is to give packages sent by some person to whoever it belongs to and I do not get to give information on who the sender is." He said angrily and left.

"What's that?" Oli asked as I shut the door.

"I have no idea," I said and placed the package on the bed.

"Aren't you going to open it?" he asked as he fixed his hair in front of the mirror.

"I don't know who it's from so I guess not," I said.

"Just open it," he said looking at me as I sat on the bed beside the package.

"Fine," I said giving in as I opened the box. Inside it was a bouquet of long stemmed purple roses. I placed the box beside me and I opened the envelope that was stuck on top of the box.

It said:

"Hey, hope you like it here and since you like the color purple, I just thought of giving this to you. I'm not quite sure if roses are your favorite kind of flowers but I hope it doesn't end up in the trash. Also if ever you break up with that stupid and dense boyfriend of yours, I would gladly take you in to my arms. Oh and before I forget, thanks for letting me in a while ago when my roommate needed his time alone and I guess that's about it.

Hope you like the present and you can stop by anytime.

-Steven"

Oli took the note from me and read it as fast as he could. After reading, he turned to me.

"Well," he started.

"Well what?" I asked not seeming to get what he was trying to say.

"What are you going to do about the flowers and this?" he said gesturing to the note.

"Well I'll put the flowers in a vase and throw the note away," I said getting up. I searched for something to put the flowers in. I checked inside the cabinet of the bedside table and luckily found one.

"Okay," he said bitterly as he left the room bringing the note along with him. I rolled my eyes and grabbed the vase and went to the bathroom.

I placed water inside the vase and placed water inside. After putting in the right amount, I placed the flowers in and put the box away. Only now I noticed the little I LOVE YOU note he wrote at the bottom of the box. What a sweet guy. Just then I heard a noise from outside my door. I went out to see what it was.

I peeked outside my room and rushed as soon as I saw Oli on top of Steven ready to strike a punch. There was a crowd surrounding them so I pushed my way in.

"Oli!" I shouted and he looked up and that's when Steven got a good hit. He punched him on the left cheek and knocked him over.

"Steven, stop it!" I said and pushed him away from Oli. He shook the hand he used to punch Oli and went away.

"It's not yet over Asher!" Oli shouted and the crowd started to disperse. Steven didn't look back. He just went in his room and slammed the door.

"What is wrong with you?" I asked him.

"Nothing," he said.

"This isn't nothing Oli and you know that," I said disappointed. He stayed silent as I helped him up and brought him to the clinic.


	8. Chapter 8

"It's only the first day and you start a fight?" the nurse asked shaking her head as she took Oli from me. Oli just stayed silent and thought long and hard. After the nurse treated him, she asked him to lie down on the bed. When he did, I sat on the chair beside the bed and wiped the washcloth on his forehead. He stared at me intently as tears flowed from my eyes.

"Oli, there's nothing to worry about. You of all people should already know that," I said and he sighed. He took my hand and sat up. He placed the washcloth on the table and wiped away my tears. I didn't even know why I was crying.

"I'm sorry," he said and he pulled me close and wrapped his arms around me.

"It's my fault," I said wrapping my arms around him gently so as not to hurt him.

"I love you, Natalie." He said letting go and I smiled.

"I love you too, Oli." I said and he leaned in and kissed me. I cupped his face with both my hands and he placed his hands on my waist. It was the feeling of perfection that made me lean in to him and kiss him with more passion but sadly that feeling had to end with the nurse seeking attention by clearing her throat.

"Ms. Sanders, rule number one, no PDA!" she exclaimed and I pulled away from Oli. I didn't want a suspension now did I? No I didn't.

"Sorry," I said but Oli held my hands and gripped them tight. His eyes were filled with so much pain and it seems as if he wanted to cry.

"Same goes for you Mr. Sykes," she said and moved towards us. "Ms. Sanders, please proceed to your room. I'll take it from here." The nurse said and with that I tried to get both my hands out of his grip and he hesitated at first but then I let go.

As I walked out the door, I turned back and looked at him. I mouthed "I'll call you," and he smiled a small smile while the nurse started talking to him. I went back to my room feeling down about the situation. Once I was at the door, I noticed that it was open but I don't think I left it open. I quickly rushed in and looked to see if anyone had entered my room but when I went in, no one was there but there was a note beside the flowers. It was from Steven and anything from him is always a bad thing. Well in Oli's point of view.

I opened the note without hesitation eager to hear what he had to say. I didn't know why though but I just felt like I needed to know. It said:

Hey, I'm really sorry about what just transpired and I'm really sorry if I hurt you in any way. I hope that someday you would learn to forgive me and right now, I realized that I went over the line and I just want you to know that I am really, truly sorry. I never wanted a fight with Oli and I didn't want to mess with anyone it's just that when I look at you and I know this might sound a bit cliché but I can't help but see myself as more than a friend with you. But I have to somehow face the truth and it will be hard but I hope you'll be there waiting for me at the finish line.

Again I'm very sorry for causing trouble.

Your friend,

Steven Asher

I read the note twice before the words processed in my brain. I really did not believe that someone could love someone in only one day. It freaked me out a bit but at the same time, I was flattered. I blushed a bit and noticed that someone was there at the open door.

"Hey," Steven said coming in uninvited but I didn't really care.

"Hi," I said feeling kinda awkward.

"You're not mad at me?" he asked shutting the door and sitting on the bed.

"Not really, I mean maybe I am but it's just hard to stay mad, you know and besides the past is past right?" I said and for some reason he got up and stood close.

"Yea, I know right?" he said tucking my hair behind my ear. I started to feel scared and the butterflies fluttered in my stomach. He was so close and all I did was stand still as if I was a statue.

"Umm…" I started but I didn't really know what to say.

"Past is past right?" he asked cupping my face in his soft and warms hands. He lifted my face so that he and I had eye contact and the next thing I knew, his lips were on mine soft and gentle.


	9. Chapter 9

It took some time to process what exactly was happening and honestly, I think I was lost… But when I regained my composure, I quickly parted from him and backed away.

"Sorry, it's just that-"

"No, you should never have done that," I said cutting him off mid sentence. I started to feel stupid and I started to feel guilty but relieved that nobody saw what exactly happened.

I sighed to myself as he smirked and said "Correct me if I'm wrong but I think I wasn't the only one who enjoyed that,"

I was starting to get a little irritated with him. First he kisses me and makes me feel all shitty. Now he's trying to rub it in? What is the deal with this guy?

"You're wrong," I said sternly. I turned away from him and looked out the window expecting him to just head out and leave me alone. But man was this guy unpredictable. Seconds seemed to pass slowly and instead of going out of my room, he walked towards me and wrapped his arms around my waist. I quickly tried to get rid of it but his grip was too strong for me and then it started to hurt.

"Steven please, don't make this any harder than it already is," I said but instead he started to put his head in the crane of my neck and he started to plant kisses.

As I tried to struggle out of his hold and tried to push him away, I shouted and screamed and for some reason, I wanted someone to hear me. And I guess he started to get a little bit tired because I was able to break free but not far enough to bust out the door and run down the hallway to tell someone what he was doing to me. He pushed me down on to the bed and he more or less pounced and landed on top of me. He gripped my wrists tightly and ignored my cries as his lips landed on mine. This time he kissed me hard and only now did I notice the taste of alcohol on his tongue. He was intoxicated and he was drunk but when he sobers up, I don't want to hear this kind of explanation from him. I continued to struggle out of his hold and I tried to get my tongue away from his but there was no hope. Well that's what I thought…

I heard the door open and someone busted in. That person got Steven off of me but I couldn't see who it really was. My eyes were closed the whole time. When Steven was off, I quickly opened my eyes and wiped my lips and saw Oli hitting him with no mercy but rage in his eyes. After several punches, Steven was unconscious and Oli dragged him into his room. Tears sprung from my eyes because guilt was filling me up too much.

Oli came back in the door with a scowl on his face. He shut the door and saw that I was practically crying my eyes out but I didn't need him to feel sorry for me. I just wanted to know that he cared and I want him to know that I'm grateful that he came just in time to save me.

"You okay?" he asked walking towards the bed. He sat right beside me and looked at my now red wrists.

"I guess," I managed to croak out.

"Did he try to…?" he trailed off.

"Yea but you came just in time," I said and embraced him.

"I'm sorry," he said wrapping his arms around my waist.

"What for?" I asked letting go as I looked at him with curiosity in my teary eyes.

"I should've never left you here alone," he said.

"Oli, you were in the clinic-"

"That's not an excuse! You shouldn't have brought me in there," he exclaimed.

"But-"

"No Natalie, I was stupid and now I know," he said cutting me off yet again. I looked at him as his eyes started to well up but he held it back effortlessly.

I let him lay down on my bed as I lay down beside him. I curled up into his chest and he wrapped his arms around me. Silence filled the room as neither of us talked. We needed this silence for some reason. I don't know if he needed it but I'm sure I did. It wasn't his fault. It was mine and none of this should have happened. If I wasn't here at this moment, if I was still back there in America, I don't think Oli and Steven would be fighting. I hated myself for being in the middle of this situation. I never really thought that this would happen to me. I mean it never did back home but I guess this place is way different and I don't think both places will ever be the same.

I just lay on his chest until I fell asleep and it wasn't until 7 in the morning that I woke up. Apparently, Oli slept with me and he never untangled his arms from my body. I kissed his cheek as I tried my best to get out without waking him up. I went into the shower and took a bath as I got ready for class. After I changed in to the weird uniform they gave to me, I blow dried my hair and placed perfume all over so that I'd smell good. I fixed my stuff and placed the needed materials for the day into my bag. Once all that was done, I tried to wake Oli up.

"Good morning," I said as soon as he opened his eyes.

"What time is it?" he asked squinting his eyes to the blinding light.

"7:25 am," I said and he lay back down and placed a pillow over his head. "Hey!" I said taking the pillow off of him.

"It's so early," he complained covering his eyes with his forearm.

"Come on," I said and he didn't move or say anything. Then, an idea popped in to my head. I got on top of him which totally got his attention. I started to plant kisses on his neck and made him moan. I stopped after a while and made him wonder what I was doing.

"We were just getting to the good part," he said looking at me.

"You're not getting any more if you don't get your ass off of this bed," I said getting up.

"Okay, I'm up already," he said getting up and holding both my hands. He looked in to my eyes and was waiting patiently for a kiss.

"Hmm…okay then," I said as I tip toed and gave him his wish.


	10. Chapter 10

We were off to the cafeteria after I waited for Oli to take a quick shower and change in to his uniform. It took quite a while but I didn't really care. If waiting means that I can be with him then that's what I shall do. I couldn't stand living without this boy for some reason and it kills me to stay away from him for too long.

We reached the cafeteria at about 7:40 A.M. and there was only 30 minutes until our separation. Somehow, our schedules never met. It was either he had s subject before I did or the other way around and sometimes they were far apart from each other. I sighed looking at my schedule as we walked towards the locker area. At least they considered changing lockers so that we'd have ours side by side. I unlocked my locker and placed my books inside and kept what I needed. Oli did the same and smiled when we both shut it at the same time.

"What's your first subject?" he asked for the third time today.

"Biology," I said for the third time in a row.

"Sorry I just can't believe our schedules are so different from each other," he said and I smiled at him.

"Well it's not entirely different. We have some subjects in common," I said as we started to walk slowly towards my first class. Luckily, his classroom was just across mine and he didn't have to walk a great distance to get to his class.

"Yea, really?" he said confused. His eyebrows merged at a point and I laughed at his reaction.

"Lunch and dismissal," I said and he rolled his eyes.

"Fine, I'll see you lunch then," he said and I went in to my class room and he went in to his.

As I went in, I looked at the chaotic class and caught some people staring me down as if I did something wrong. I sat at the only empty table at the back and set down my things. First days are totally not my thing especially when Oli wasn't here to help me get through it. I don't even know how I survived first days before. I sighed to myself and grabbed my notebook and a pen and started doodling at the back page as I waited for the teacher to come.

"That seems like fun," a familiar voice said. I looked up and looked to my left just to see Steven sitting on the table right beside mine. I ignored him and focused my attention on the heart I was shading.

"Settle down class," the teacher stated coming in the room to start the class. I thank her for her timing. If she didn't come at that moment, I don't think I'd survive Steven commenting about the stuff that I've been doing.

The teacher started saying stuff about Biology but I don't really pay that much attention to orientations so I kept doodling away. When I was bored and I didn't know what else to draw anymore, that's when I looked up from my notebook and started listening to all the crap that she was saying. Turns out we were being grouped in to twos for the whole semester.

"Asher and Sanders right there at the corner," the teacher pointed and my eyes nearly popped out of its sockets. It took time for me to understand exactly what she said and when I did, Steven was staring at me from the table we were assigned to be in with quite a big smirk on his face. I shook my head and grabbed all my things and stomped over to the table. I sat on my chair looking away from him. I did not feel comfortable sitting here with him by my side and I don't think I can last the whole year.

[i]This is stupid[/i] I thought to myself. It's all so stupid and I can't believe I'm making a fuss out of all this. Clearly he was drunk and maybe after that blow he really couldn't remember a thing. But there was no mark on his face which kinda made me wonder.

"[b]This[/b] will be fun," he said exaggerating when he said this. I rolled my eyes and waited for the class to end.

I kept silent the whole time even when he said some things which I couldn't really understand since he was muttering most of them but I'm sure he said hi more than once or twice. Ignoring is one of my strong points so I didn't really have difficulty in shunning him away when I didn't feel answering him.

"Okay, class, you may go," the teacher said and I quickly stuffed my things in my bag and left the room. But he was too quick for me.

"Would you mind telling me what I did wrong? What did I do to deserve all this?" he asked innocently but I just narrowed my eyes on him and ducked past him and out the door.

I walked briskly to my locker to put in the heavy Biology book we'd be using this year. I looked at my schedule again and walked quickly to class. Luckily I didn't get lost. I exhaled heavily as soon as I sat down. I thought about what happened and practically zoned out of class. I didn't even know half the things the teacher mentioned during his discussion. I was a total mess and I knew that. If only I could get away and have some time to myself to think for once, maybe I'd start paying attention.

I walked from class to class not really learning anything. I may have listened to some of them but for some reason, everything I heard passed through the other ear and out of my head. Time passed quickly and I found myself walking to my locker to put my stuff in so that I can get ready for lunch. When I reached my locker, Oli was there with arms opened wide. I hugged him tightly and wasn't planning to let go until he started to loosen his grip.

"You okay?" he asked as soon as I let go.

"Not really," I huffed. I leaned against the lockers and told him about Steven being my Bio partner for practically the rest of the semester. His mood started to change slowly from more or less happy to pissed off because of Steven. I hated him and apparently, so did Oli. We went to the cafeteria to get a decent lunch and I told him to forget about it but for some reason, I doubted him. It didn't seem like he'd just forget about it like that. I bet he'd find any excuse just to kill him but maybe kill isn't the right word. Probably beat up would be a much better phrase. Either way, he still wants to hurt Steven no matter what…

At least that's what I think…


	11. Chapter 11

[OLI'S POV]

Today, I got up, I felt good having her by my side. I felt good going to the cafeteria for breakfast with her on the first day. I felt awesome that I was with this extraordinary girl. I'd protect her from anyone that would harm her or treat her badly. I'd do anything for her but it seems as if there's only one thing that's holding me back. I can't really call him a person because in my eyes, I can only see him as a monster and nothing more. I don't think he has any human inside of him and killed me to the bone when I saw him pinning her down to the bed and trying to make her like him. I never thought I'd want to kill someone just for a girl because ever since, no one has ever messed with me because they knew exactly who I was and what I can do.

Knowing Steven and his reputation in school, I never thought he'd turn in to someone like that over the summer break. I mean he was a decent guy and a great friend…he used to be a close friend of mine til that last day of school. Last year, we had quite a fight. No physical abuse though, it was all verbal. The conflict was about his girl.

In the last day of school, there was like a year end party for the whole grade and well it's not a real party without alcohol right? So since it was unsupervised, there were drinks everywhere and they never really lasted that long so if someone was invited, he or she wasn't allowed to get in unless, they had something to offer. I gave beer and that was more or less it. All I remember was getting so wasted that night and having Steven's girlfriend sweet talk me in to going up the stairs to play with her. I didn't really plan on getting up so I just sat there and ignored everything she was telling me. I just nodded and nodded but I didn't move. He saw us on the couch. She was on my lap and her fingers crawling up and down my arm. My hands were kept to myself for some reason but he thinks that it's all my fault since he thought that his girl wouldn't do such a thing. He never really trusted me after that and you know I couldn't believe that he thought that I pretended to keep my hands to myself just because I saw him staring at us. I mean I was drunk and I swear I didn't do anything to her. People even said so but he wouldn't believe me and he even told me that it was bros before hoes. What a sucker.

"I'll be fine, don't worry about it," Natalie told me after she told me everything that happened during her Biology class.

"Hmm, I doubt it," I muttered hoping she wouldn't hear me but apparently she did.

"Oli, I'll be fine, I swear." She said putting her hands up to show me that there were no fingers crossed. She was the sweetest thing and I wasn't sure if I should just let it go. He went too far I mean I did nothing and he wants revenge? What for?

"Fine then," I said and we left the cafeteria. The bell rang as soon as we went out the door so we hurried to our lockers and ran to our classrooms. I got in before the teacher did so I was safe. But I don't know about her I hope I didn't get her in to any trouble or whatsoever. That would be bad.

"Settle down everyone and we shall start the class," Mrs. Heinfield said as she entered the classroom. Everyone started to shut their mouths and started to listen to the discussion. "Since today is the first day, I'll take it easy on all of you. Today, all you will be doing is poetry," she said and everyone groaned.

She ignored the groans and went on with the instructions. She told us to make it about anything we want for as long as it can be considered poetry. She'd be the one to keep it and it will be confidential so no one else will know what you wrote. That was one of the things I liked about her. She doesn't really make us share anything in class. She's a pretty laid back kinda teacher.

I started to run my pen on paper and started writing away. She roamed around the class but stopped when she reached my place. I looked up at her and saw that there was curiosity in her eyes.

"Umm, did I do something wrong?" I asked her innocently.

"No, it's just that I haven't seen you work hard before." She said surprised and that kinda shocked me but it's true, I am a slacker. I smiled at her and he walked away.

I continued writing and changed my style of poetry. I didn't usually write things that rhymed. I wrote songs but not like this…

When I was through writing, I looked down at the words I wrote and re read my work silently. But then as I read it, I realized that I repeated some stanzas and then I noticed that I was still writing a song… I rolled my eyes at myself. This? Different from the rest? Like that'll happen. I tried to think of a tune but all that came out were more and more words so I just continued writing and ended up with something like this:

_[i]Our legs begin to break  
We've walked this path for far too long  
My lungs, they start to ache  
But still we carry on  
I'm choking on my words  
Like I got a noose around my neck  
I can't believe it's come to this  
And dear, I fear  
That this ship is sinking tonight_

I won't give up on you  
These scars won't tear us apart  
So don't give up on me  
It's not too late for us  
And I'll save you from yourself  
And I'll save you from yourself

Our legs begin to break  
We've walked this path for far too long  
My lungs begin to ache  
But still we carry on  
I'm choking on my words  
Like I got a noose around my neck

I'm not coming home tonight  
I'm not coming home tonight  
'Cause dear I fear, dear I fear  
I'm not coming home tonight  
I'm not coming home tonight  
'Cause dear I fear  
This ship is sinking  
Is there hope for us?  
Can we make it out alive?  
I can taste the failure on your lips  
Is there hope for us?  
Can we make it out alive?  
I can taste the failure

Close your eyes  
There's nothing we can do  
But sleep in this bed that we made for ourselves  
You're trapped in your past  
Like it's six feet under

I won't give up on you  
These scars won't tear us apart  
So don't give up on me  
It's not too late for us  
I'll save you from yourself  
I'll save you from yourself  
I'll save you from yourself  
I'll save you from yourself

Try to numb the pain  
With alcohol and pills  
But it won't repair your trust  
You can't stand on two fucking feet  
With a substance as a crutch

I won't give up  
I won't give up on you  
We'll play this symphony  
I won't give up  
I won't give up on you  
We'll play this symphony of sympathy

I won't give up  
I won't give up on you  
We'll play this symphony of sympathy  
I won't give up  
I won't give up on you  
We'll play this symphony of sympathy[/i]

I stared it for a while as I let the time pass slowly. I didn't want this class to end so I didn't see the need for a rush.


	12. Chapter 12

[OLI'S POV]

The days passed rather quickly and well let's just say that it all turned out okay and that Steven didn't bother standing in my way. I mean probably he got traumatized or he finally got his revenge. But it's sort of meaningless I mean I hardly did anything to him and he goes through all this? I mean that was like months ago or maybe even a year. But I guess he just can't get over something that's not even there to get over. But I didn't really care much. As long as Natalie's here beside me, I'm fine, actually I'm great and I don't think I've felt like this ever since well I don't think I've ever felt like this at all. For some reason, when I'm with her, I feel like the weight of the world on my shoulders vanished and it's as if nothing can ever hold me back ever again. When I'm with her it's like my world turns upside down and suddenly I'm really happy about it and I just can't hold back a smile. It's as if I can swim an ocean for her and stay up just to watch her fall asleep and hear her breathe in and out as she curls up on my chest. It's what I can call happiness. That overwhelming feeling, the one that spins me around and never lets me fall. The one feeling I've craved to feel all this time. It's finally here, right in front of my face and I can't help but think that life is finally getting better. Better than it already is.

"What are you smiling about?" Natalie asked when she got up on a Saturday morning.

"I'm just happy," I whispered hoping that the feeling won't ever fade.

"Really?" she asked with a big, bright smile on her face.

"Mhmm," I said and gave her a morning kiss. We cuddled for a few minutes and then she got up and went to the bathroom. I didn't sleep in her room last night. I just broke in with the spare key she gave me two hours ago.

It was Saturday meaning we were free from anything academic and we can do whatever the hell we wanted to. I had a show today and I was hoping that she'd come along and be with me. I didn't ask her yet but I was hoping to as soon as she finishes her shower.

I waited and waited and usually it took forever but then she came out fully clothed and beautiful as always. "What are you staring at?" she asked as she walked towards me.

"You of course," I said and she giggled. I've always liked her laugh or giggle or whatever the hell you call it.

"Whatever Oli," she said as she leaned in and we started kissing right then and there. Her breath was minty and it tasted fresh and sweet. I brushed my teeth and my breath smelled like nothing. Probably because I brushed them like a couple of hours ago or something like that.

That feeling, having her lips on mine, it gave me goosebumps and made my skin crawl and that was probably the best feeling ever. Chills started running up and down my spine and butterflies started fluttering in my stomach. There's no telling when all this will stop and I hope it never does.

"I wanted to ask you out today," I said as soon as we inched apart.

"Sure, where are we going?" she asked gently placing her forehead against mine.

"Well, I wanted to know if you were interested to hear me scream my lungs out at a show tonight." I said crossing my fingers hoping that she' say yes.

"Sure, I'd love to." She said as her eyes brightened and her smile grew wider.

"Cool, but what did you want to do now?" I asked kissing he once more. I held her face in my hands and quite frankly, I don't think I've held anything softer.

"Probably go out to eat," she said in between kisses.

"Okay then after this," I said and we fell on to the bed and just started making out.

[NATALIE'S POV]

Wow, I never expected this to happen to me but apparently it did happen and I didn't want to fight it. I wanted it to last forever. With him I felt a lot safer and I know I've said that like a thousand times before but I don't really care anymore. He thought me not to care about anything else but him and honestly, that was a hard lesson to learn but then I did get to find out how to do it and well, here I am. But one thing that was bothering me was my stomach. I slept until eleven this morning and I was quite hungry. I mean I'm not used to skip breakfast and well it was already 12 P.M.

Practically, the only reason I got up was because my stomach was grumbling so hard and Oli's comforting breath on my neck. I really couldn't ask for anything more.

"I really don't wanna ruin this but my stomach's grumbling like crazy," I told him in the sweetest way possible.

"Fine, but we're not done yet," he said and got up.

"We never are," I said and he smirked at me.

We went down after I put on some shoes and got what I needed and locked the door. Hand in hand, we walked in the empty hallways and made our way to the parking lot where Oli's car was. I got in the passenger's seat and he got in the driver's seat and off we went.

"So what kind of music do you like?" Oli asked as soon as we were on the road.

"Well, I like mostly all kinds actually, I'm a very open person," I said looking out the window watching the wondrous view.

"Well do you think you'll like the band's music?" he asked shyly.

"I have no idea. What's it like?" I asked looking at him as he blushed.

"Well, its deathcore. You know like death metal and metal core fused together," he said quite nervously. Hearing those two words being fused together didn't seem like a good idea to me. I mean I've never listened to anything like it but hopefully, they have some good stuff.

"Hmmm, sounds interesting," I said. I wasn't lying. Clearly I was telling the truth since I've never heard of it from anyone.

"I'm glad you think that," he said smiling. I wonder why he seemed nervous. Probably it was because he was performing and maybe he had some kind of stage fright. How cute…

"Well, lets just say I'm looking forward to it," I said and he turned really red. He really was nervous, huh? Well he looks cute when he turns nervous, that's for sure.


	13. Chapter 13

We got to the venue right on time for the band to make a sound check and all that. They rehearsed a few songs before anyone else came in but I wasn't really listening since I was kinda preoccupied with so many random things that cross my mind back and forth. It's quite overwhelming really since they're all so random and so unexpected but I managed to stay put with all that stuff in my small head. I never thought that I'd be thinking about Steven coming in here. I mean it could happen and maybe it won't. I don't want a fight and I don't really want a mess but there's this weird feeling in my gut that tells me that maybe he will come over and start something with Oli.

Why is he in my head anyway? Ever since that day, the day I found out that we were going to be lab partners for the rest of the semester, thoughts of him came in to my head and made me think more about what might happen with him and forgetting about what Oli might be doing. It's not as if I'm falling in love with him, at least that's what I think. It's just that I take precaution I mean something unexpected might happen since Steven's such a mysterious guy and I mean that in a bad way. The worst way possible since with him, nothing good happens.

"You okay? You seem kinda stressed out." Matt said sitting on the chair beside me. I snapped out instantly out of my trance and faced him. It's been such a long while since we spoke. We studied in different schools so meeting each other was kinda stunning. Well maybe that's not the right word but I can't think of anything else so why don't we just leave it at that.

"Yea, I'm fine," I said plastering a smile on my face.

"Okay…" he said not really trusting my statement. He knew I was lying but amazingly, he didn't push it. "So how are you?" he said after a minute of silence.

"Okay I guess I mean school's kinda difficult and pressuring." I said and he laughed.

"So you mean it's harder over here?" He asked in so much disbelief.

"I guess," I shrugged. We exchanged words and let the time pass for a while. I asked him about school and if he met anyone special and all those typical questions you'd ask a friend you haven't seen in a while. He surprised me with his answers. I wasn't really expecting this all from him. I mean the day I met him, he was okay at first and then he turned all gloomy after Oli came by and now, he's as happy as ever and I'm happy for him.

"Wow, that's awesome," I commented after he told me about some of his experiences in his school.

"Ha! That's nothing yet," he exclaimed. A few minutes passed and the show was about to start. I was starting to feel excited but I didn't really know what to expect. Well surprises can't hurt right?

"Hey!" Oli called out from the other side of the room. I got up from the chair I sat on and walked over to him. He was talking to this tech guy so I don't think he would be able to get to me if he waited for the guy to stop talking.

After a few nods and sentences being said, Oli was free and the tech guy went in to the back to do his job.

"Wish me good luck?" Oli asked with a bright smile on his face.

"Sure," I said and kissed him before he said anything else. "Good luck," I whispered in to his ear.

"I love you," he said and ran quickly up the stage before I said anything else. I was stunned with what he stated and looked stared at what was in front of me with my mouth gaped open. I felt my face get really hot meaning I was blushing like crazy. I regained composure after a while and turned to him and mouthed my response since people were starting to come in. He smiled at me before turning back to the make. I stayed right in front with so many other people and waited for them to start the show.

"Hey everyone!" Lee shouted in to the mic. Everyone responded with a yell and a shout and received smiles from the band.

"Before we start, I just wanna say that Natalie-"Oli said catching my attention, "I love you so fucking much!" he said making me blush once again. I received a lot of looks from the people around me since when Oli said that, he pointed right at me. Girls were all up my grill and eyeing me head to toe. I shrugged it off not wanting to ruin the show for them.

When they started to play and when Oli started to sing or scream, everyone started to sing along. I listened closely to the lyrics and mixed the melody in afterwards and in all honesty, they were awesome. I've never heard anything like them. I mean the words and the music and just every little thing about them got me hooked and well I just never thought that I could like music this much. I was amazed and astonished and I think I left my mouth open and my eyes popped the whole time the show was on. But somewhere in the middle, I felt a hand on my shoulder. The person was tapping on it rapidly and it was annoying. I turned back to ask that person what the problem was but when I turned around, I hardly said anything seeing as though Steven was standing right in front of me.

He told me to meet him outside and then he left. I didn't really know what to do. I didn't know if I could trust him and I didn't know if I was supposed to follow him outside. But before I knew it, I was heading for the door making my way to the side of the place meeting him with this weird smile on his face, the kind of smile that told you that you shouldn't have done what you did but since I was already out there, I couldn't do anything about it.


	14. Chapter 14

[OLI'S POV]

As I made music for the crowd, I tried to search for the eyes that captured my soul. I tried to look for Natalie but she wasn't in the crowd anymore. Where could she be? I looked around some more but I wasn't able to find her anywhere. I shrugged it off and went on with the show. I couldn't give them a shitty one. Not today.

After the show, I got off the stage and went on to signing. There was still no sign of her anywhere.

"Dude, do you know where Natalie is?" I asked Matt who wasn't really paying attention to me.

"I saw her go out with this guy," a random stranger told me and I instantly propped up from the seat I sat in and went out the door. She wasn't there. I walked around searching for the face I loved so very much only to be let down and finding nothing but an open road and a building right on the other side. I sighed heavily and went back in.

I can't believe she just left like that. If she had to leave, she should've told me. The whole time I was signing things for the fans, I thought about where she could be but she's from America and it's been a month since her arrival so where the hell could she possibly be? I sat there stunned. It has been at least an hour and a half since she's been AWOL. She didn't call, no text messages, nothing. Nothing at all. So since I cared for her so much, too much actually, I got my phone out of my pocket and dialed her number and called. It went straight to voice mail.

"Hey Natalie, where are you? I've been looking for you for almost two whole hours. Please call me as soon as possible." I said casually with just a bit of anxiety. But in reality, I was worried. Really worried.

I don't know if she has a ride home. I don't know where she is. I don't know how I'm gonna sleep tonight not knowing where she is or who she's with. For all I know, it might be some cruel local trying to kill her or do something utterly disgusting or something like that. Not knowing something sucks and I hate not knowing why she left.

[NATALIE'S POV]

When I got out of the venue to see Steven, I thought that something bad might happen yet again but unusually, he was there to apologize and to make things up to me. I told him that he didn't need to but he insisted. I thought long and hard before getting in to the car and driving off with him. I should've called Oli but when I tried to look for my phone, I noticed that I left it in the room. I sighed silently to myself and hoped that he didn't really worry too much.

Truthfully, I was scared to be seated this close to Steven. For some reason I was terrified that something stupid might happen but I really wasn't planning to go anywhere with him. He just has his ways which is crazy because I have a head to but right now, it's malfunctioning and I'm not thinking straight. But that's not a good enough excuse now is it? No it isn't. It never is actually and I can't believe I actually agreed to this. Maybe he brainwashed me and placed me inside the car without even me knowing but that can't happen since I remember agreeing to him. I remember the words coming out of my mouth and I just wanted to take it back. This is total shit.

"Where exactly do you plan to take me?" I said breaking the very awkward silence that surrounded us way too much.

"Somewhere special," he said and I turned my head to look at him. I cocked an eyebrow at him. "What? Can't I do something special for someone who deserves it?" he said and I rolled my eyes at him.

"You do know I have a boyfriend who'll do that for me." I muttered under my breath and I almost heard him roll his eyes.

"But I don't think he makes you feel special." He said and I looked at him with eyes wide open. He crossed a line there.

"What did you just say?" I said starting to boil up with anger. He so did not know what Oli made me feel and he's not one to judge.

"Sorry, it's just that-"

"Save it, I don't wanna hear anything else." I said leaning putting my elbow near the car window and leaning on my clenched fist that pushed my cheeks in.

"No, look if it wasn't obvious already, I like you Natalie-"

"You hardly know me," I said cutting him off. He was getting on my nerve. I heard him heave a heavy sigh and then the car stopped in a parking lot of a place I didn't know.

"Look, just enjoy the night, okay?" he asked sweetly but I didn't fall for that.

"No, take me back." I demanded and turned to him. He seemed stunned. "That was an order. What are you waiting for?" I spewed out. I really wasn't in the mood for his stupid confessions so before he said or did anything else, he turned on the engine and we headed back to the venue. I got out as soon as he stopped and he sped away once I was on the side walk.

I really wasn't sure if I was supposed to just stand there in the cold or go in. But I decided to do the harder thing which was going in and facing Oli. Once I got the nerve to get in, I noticed that there were less people and that the band was just chilling on those comfortable seats that were set for them for the signing. I briskly walked over to them and apologized for walking out on their show but Oli wasn't there to hear it. Apparently he was in the bathroom taking a break so I walked over to the bathrooms and waited for him to come out.

It took about a minute or so until he came out with wet hands that he wiped on his shirt. When he saw me his eyes gaped open and he ran and gave me a bear hug. That took me by surprise but that was the thing for tonight. Surprises.

"Where've you been?" he asked with way too much anxiety after setting me down on my feet.

"I'll tell you but you have to promise me that you won't get mad." I said and thought that I was acting so kindergarten.

"How can I stay mad at you?" Oli said cupping my face in his hands. I held his wrists and looked in to his eyes and told him about the whole Steven incident and how stupid I was. He told me that I wasn't stupid but that was kinda expected but what I didn't expect was that he was actually happy after I told him that he apologized. Maybe he was hiding his emotions. Plastering a smile to disguise the frown.

"You're not mad?" I asked surprised.

"Nope," he said and he kissed me passionately. He has never really kissed me like this before and I still had so much to tell him like how sorry I was for missing the show. Wait, I mean walking out on him. I think that maybe that hurt him a lot but apparently, he was content with me just standing there with him. I never thought that this was how he would react but I can't really tell him that this shouldn't be his reaction. That would be stupid. That would be so me. And I didn't want to ruin the moment and surprise him and make him think that I didn't love him.

But as time went by, and while we hung out more and more last night, I thought about what Steven said. I was surprised and I didn't know that he would like me, like me. This was one hell of a night to say the least.


	15. Chapter 15

[STEVEN'S POV]

As I drove back to boarding school that night, I thought about what the hell I did. I totally wrecked my reputation. This was so fucking embarrassing. She must be thinking that I'm a try hard but please, if I wanted a girl, I'd totally score. But her, well I didn't really want her. Or so I thought. I just thought of her as revenge. Something that would get me even with Oli because I never believed his side of the story. From what that girl told me, she was innocent and he was guilty. She told me that he was trying to seduce her and trying to persuade her into getting a room with him. She also told me that he wanted her to whisper things into his ear to show him that she was worthy to be messed around with and if she didn't, he'd do whatever it takes to make her. That wasn't the Oli I knew. That was just plain cruelty. He has changed so much and I never thought that this was where it will all end. I never spoke to him after that ugly night and for some reason, I thought that Oli wouldn't be capable of doing something like that but then I thought that maybe that's what he wanted me to think so he can walk with his face held up high but I wasn't gonna let it go just like that. That would be preposterous. I had my reputation too.

When I took a left turn, I realized that I didn't want to go just yet so I made a U-Turn and went back to where I just came from. I didn't go to the venue since going back there would only mean trouble. I went to this bar near a hotel. Since I was gonna go get drunk, I won't be able to drive myself back so I might as well check in and stay for the night. I thought about this long and hard and I didn't really have anything in my pocket except the emergency card that my mom gave me before I left. I didn't really use it for anything so why not spend it on something that can intoxicate me?

I went in the hotel. I needed something better than those cheap stuff they had in the bar next door. I climbed on the chair and told the bartender what I wanted he obediently gave me everything I wanted without even asking me for an ID. I guess he thought I was older or at least 21. But no, I was 18 and underage but who the hell cares anymore?

I chugged drink after drink and got so wasted that I almost threw up in front of the front desk clerk who helped me up to my room. Once I was on the bad, she went out quickly and closed the door quietly. I didn't think I wanted this night to end yet. I needed some entertainment so I called some call girls off the directory. Who knew they had those there? Well I surely didn't. Minutes later they arrived. They knocked softly on my door and I stumbled around before getting it open. Once I got it open, I saw these really hot sluts in maid outfits and well they let theirselves in without waiting for me to say anything. I guess from the way they looked at me, they could tell that I was wasted.

One of the three hookers put some music on but in my ears, there was nothing but a loud buzz. I completely lost track of everything I did after that but all I know was that I spent the night with three naked girls by my side.

Morning came quickly and all of a sudden, I was alone again. They didn't wait for me to pay? I quickly got up for fear that they might've stolen something from me. My head could've killed me right then and there but luckily, I wasn't dumb enough to place aspirin in my pocket. I got a bottle of water from the fridge and downed it within seconds. This day wasn't getting any better, I could feel it. I checked my wallet to see that everything was still in it. I didn't really get it though… So instead of just dazing off into whatever was in my head, I got my clothes on and checked out of the hotel. I smelled like shit but hell who cared? I received some odd looks from the people around me but I shrugged it off as I let the front desk clerk swipe the emergency card to pay for everything. When the clerk in the front desk showed me the receipt, my eyes nearly popped out of its sockets. It was if what I saw on the piece of paper was the scariest thing I've ever seen. I shook all the thoughts that developed off of my head. I didn't want to think about me being an idiot right now. It's stupid and that's not who I am. I'm a great person. I'm civilized and intelligent and I am not capable of doing anything stupid at all.

"Miss, what day is today?" I asked completely losing track of time.

"Um, it's Sunday Mr. Asher." The clerk said in so much politeness.

"Time?" I asked.

"It's about 10:20 in the morning," she said and I nodded.

"Thank you," I said and left. I wasn't really sure about what I wanted to do next but with this hangover totally making me lose my mind, I'm sure I was in for something outrageous.

I got in my car in some kinda hurry I didn't really understand. I wasn't sure about what I was planning really. It was as if my own conscience was kicked out of my own head and it was stupid to say the least but with the hangover taking over, there was nothing else I could do. I drove in to school seeing people coming in from their weekends. I saw Oli's car in the parking lot so they're bound to be here. I hurried up the stairs not thinking about why I was hurrying. I took a quick shower in my room and fixed myself, erasing all the traces of fun I had last night. I didn't really remember everything that went down but all I know was that it was fun without a doubt.

I took a deep breath before walking out of my door and checking my hallway. Today was the day the world turned upside down and I wouldn't care. Today was the day where I was finally going to be equal with him. I stroked my hair back before knocking on the door. There was a fifty percent chance that he would be in that room but I'll just have to take my chances. I love challenges and his was the easiest of them all.

"Hey," Natalie said cheerfully. I didn't think she was expecting me because once she opened the door fully to reveal the person on the other side, her eyes took away all the cheerfulness in them and exchanged them with fear and anxiety.

"Hey," I said leaning on the side of the door. She didn't really say anything after that so I let myself in. All she did was move back as if I was some kinda monster but she was just too blind to see that she was actually the monster's girlfriend.

I closed the door and locked it before I spoke again. "Where's your boyfriend?" I asked plastering a smile on my face. This was gonna be easy.

"He's with his parents but he'll be back soon." She said but I could tell she was lying. Oli never came back 'til 5 or 6 in the afternoon.

"Sure he will," I said and I moved towards her. She sat on her bed looking at everything around her. Making me the invisible one but I wasn't really gonna let her get away with that now was I? Nope, I wasn't so once our faces were only inches away, I held her face gently in my hands and kissed her.

We had lots of time before the monster comes back so I took my time. She didn't really fight it and I guess that she kinda liked it which made it a whole lot easier for me. I started undressing her as if she was some kinda doll and then I pulled out my shirt and dressed down to only my boxers. Our lips never went far away from each other. They moved together in a pleasurable way. I took out the condom I prepared and placed it in without removing my lips from her. Next thing I knew, we were both under the sheets working for my pleasure. I didn't know if this pleased her but I guess it did because she let it happen.

She called out my name in a way that made me want to touch her more and more. I sucked on her neck pretending I was some kinda vampire that was after her blood but no, I wasn't like that. I just sucked until I made a mark. I wanted this all to be obvious so that we will all be happy. Well at least I would be filled with so much joy.

I guess we made love for about an hour or so. Lips moving in sync, her legs wrapped around my waist, my hands in the uncomfortable zones and well, I had a great time all in all. This was something I don't think I can ever forget but the only thing that kept popping up in my head was:

_Why did she just let this all happen? _


	16. Chapter 16

[NATALIE'S POV]

What the hell just happened? What the hell did I just do? As I watched Steven walk out the door with a victorious smile on his face, I played 1 million questions in my head. But I couldn't just stay naked under the sheets like that. So I took a shower and tried to wash away all the traces of Steven from my body. I never thought I would make this happen and what's even worse was that I didn't even put up a fight which was shitty on my part. So much guilt flooded my consciousness and even I couldn't take it all in anymore. Once I took a bath and changed in to fresh new clothes, I just lay on the bed we fucked in. I let all the tears out and just kept them going. There was no stopping now. I felt so slutty and stupid and all those really bad stuff you could possibly think about and all in all guilt filled everything around me which was stupid because I've never felt like this before. I've been cheated on several times before but I've never been the cheater and I just wonder how those people who've done this to me kept living their lives without a single trace of guilt in their being or in their façade.

I didn't know if I was supposed to call him or if I was supposed to cover it up and hide it until I find the right time to spit it all out but that doesn't always work out and what's even worse is that I really don't know he's gonna get angrier at. I mean Steven and Oli share a bad background and our relationship's just about to get worse once this gets out.

All of a sudden, my phone rang pulling me out of the pool of guilt that drowned me inside out. I picked it up quickly and saw that it was Matt calling.

"Hey," I said lying back down as soon as I picked the phone up.

"Hey, how've you been?" he asked restlessly.

"Shitty all over," I said not caring about what might happen or what I might tell him. It's a stupid way to let everything out but at least it's a start right?

"Wow, strong choice of words there. What happened?" he said with a light chuckle although he tried to stifle it so as not to hurt my feelings but I think I can handle that now I mean this all too nasty.

"Yea, well I don't really know how to say this-"

"You can tell me anything Natalie. I'm not that judgmental." He said and I sighed knowing that he wasn't even before he stated it.

"But you can't tell anyone," I said and my eyes started welling up once more.

"Natalie, you know me better than that." He said and he was right. He was trustworthy. Unlike me.

I heaved a heavy sigh before spitting it all out. "I had sex with Steven," I said and waited for his reaction. Clearly he was stunned because he didn't say anything for quite a while.

"You mean he raped you?-"

"No, it wasn't like that," I said not letting a split second pass me by.

"Then what was it like? Wait that sounded wrong I mean, how did it happen?" he asked me slowly not really wanting to let the words flow out of his mouth.

"Well, I kinda just let it happen," I said giving a not so specific answer.

"Elaborate please?" he asked with a hint of uncertainty in his voice.

"Well, first, I was just in my room wondering what time Oli was gonna come back from his parent's house and then all of a sudden while I was lying on my bed, someone knocked on the door and-"

"Wait, hold on for a second. What time was it approximately?" he asked butting in but I didn't really mind I mean taking it slow is actually a really great idea for a story like this.

"Umm, about three hours ago?" I said but he didn't reply right away. I pictured what the outcome of his look might be like but then shrugged it off when he asked me to continue.

"Okay, go on," he said and I started from where I left off.

"Steven was on the other side although I thought it was Oli so I let my guard down which was utterly stupid of me. And so he ended up letting himself in as I sat there on the bed thinking about what exactly would become of this meeting of ours but as soon as he locked the door, I knew that this wasn't gonna be a good thing well it's not that I expected it to be but after a few seconds, I lost my mind but I didn't panic. No, none of that. Instead, he started asking me where Oli was and I guess he knew where he was exactly because he took a risk and made me give myself to him," I said feeling nasty after all the words I heard myself say.

"Wow, this is gonna be hard to take in," he said and I looked up at the ceiling.

"I know and what's even crazier is that I let it all happen just like that," I said feeling absolutely sorry for my pitiful self.

"Which brings me to the question: Why did you let it all happen?" he said and for a minute there I thought I couldn't or wasn't able to answer that question but suddenly, the haze in my head started to clear out leaving me with only one stupid and disgusting reason.

"Well, uh, I-I guess I, uh, I guess I'm starting to like him," I said not believing what I said exactly.

"Umm, did I hear you right?" he asked reassuringly.

"Yea, I guess you did." I said and then I started to cry. I sobbed and sobbed and practically cried my heart out and he just listened to me as I did so.

"You uh, want me to come over there?" he asked me politely and nodded which I knew he couldn't see. "I take that as a yes," he said and I wiped the fresh tears that poured down my face without constraint.

"Okay," I said and then I hung up. I didn't really mean it that way I mean it just happened and well that thing with Steven, it just happened as well.

But only one thing seems crystal clear to me now and that is:

I'm falling in love with Steven and I'm falling faster than you think.


	17. Chapter 17

[MATT'S POV]

Going over to her school and going in to her room wasn't in my to do list today. Actually I didn't really have anything planned. So why not comfort a friend who needs comfort? Well guess what, this isn't going to be easy. It's worse than mission: impossible because as we all know, my feelings for her hasn't subsided yet and well let's just say I don't know how to get out of there without doing anything wrong. I thought about ways on how to just act cool and casual but I really didn't know why when I think of something that was maybe good enough, I end up changing my mind and telling myself that it was a bad thing.

Once my car was parked in the parking lot, I walked towards the building and went through the open doors. I asked the receptionist about her room number and retrieved the information without any delay or any source of trouble. Not what I expected but I rolled along.

As I went up the stairs and in to the empty hall way looking for her room, my mind wouldn't stop buzzing and telling me that I should just head back and tell her that something came up but I didn't listen to my mind. My heart was in control. I know it sounds cheesy and corny but it situations like these, it can't be helped. I walked up to her room and knocked twice before she opened it. She smiled when she saw me on the other side but then after she asked me to come in, that smile washed away and turned in to a frown. From the look on her face, you could easily tell that she'd been crying. There were bags right below her beautiful hazel brown eyes and they seemed soaked and plus, she'd been crying since our conversation.

"So how are you holding up?" I asked softly as I started a new conversation.

"Not very well," She said looking out the window.

"It'll be alright don't worry," I said walking towards her and rubbing circles in to her back. She found a pillow on my shoulder and leaned on it. I found that very awkward but then shrugged it off knowing that it wouldn't happen like that.

"Thanks for being here by the way," she said looking up at me and walking over to the bed. She sat on the edge and patted on the space beside her gesturing me to sit there.

I sat on her bed and looked at the floor feeling nothing but awkward and weird. "Sure, no problem,"

"So what now?" She asked me causing me to look up from the carpeted floor.

"I'm guessing you'll need some rest. I bet you 20 pounds your eyes hurt like hell." I said making her smile.

"Well, I don't have that money and yes, you are right. My eyes hurt and I guess I need some-"she yawned before she finished her sentence.

"Well then, sleep tight," I said as she lay down on her pillow.

I was about to get up but she grabbed my wrist and said, "Stay,"

I smiled at her and nodded knowing that that was what I was going to do. As she closed her eyes and laid her thoughts to rest, I got up from the bed and dragged my butt over to the couch and made myself comfortable. I didn't really know what to do so I tried to find something to keep me entertained but then I found myself closing my eyes and drifting off to sleep.

[OLI'S POV]

It's been 7 hours since I left boarding school and went back home. I felt tired and bored of watching my parents talk so many other family friends and losing me in the scene. We had a family gathering and well that means total boredom or well maybe boredom isn't really the right word. Doom can take its place in any day.

Finally, the clock struck 12 and it was already 6 P.M. I made a deal with my mom telling her that I'd be out at exactly 6 and she agreed to it without hesitation. I guess she trusted me. But since it was time, I had to tell her that I had to go.

"Hey mom, I need to go now," I said in a demanding way. She frowned at me before nodding.

"Be back next week, okay?" she said and the kissed my cheek. From the smell of her breath, it was pretty crystal that she had been drinking and I'm guessing she drank too much since she started acting all loopy and high once I walked away. I shook my head at her and headed out the door leaving the premises without much notice.

I wanted to see Natalie. I didn't know how I survived the whole day but probably knowing that I was gonna see her at the end of the day did the job. I climbed in the car and revved up the engine as fast as I could. I backed away from the garage and sped down the open road not really minding the signs. The police officers weren't so strict in this part of the town so I wasn't really worried. I got to school 30 minutes later with a feeling of relief and happiness. I was way too happy to call it a day knowing that she'd be there by my side when I fall asleep. I rushed up the stairs once I got in and knocked on her door as soon as I stood right in front of it.

To my surprise, Matt was the one who opened it for her. "She's asleep," he said before walking past me. He walked down the hall way and went down the flight of stairs. I wondered about what he was doing in her room but then shrugged it off and softly shut the door without waking her up. I lay down beside her and toyed with her hair before wrapping my arms around her and sleeping by her side.


	18. Chapter 18

[OLI'S POV]

I woke up at around 7 in the morning only finding that Natalie wasn't in bed anymore. I checked in the bathroom and she wasn't there either so instead of wasting precious time, I went in to my dorm and took a bath and then changed in to my uniform. Once I was done with all that, I checked my phone to see if she left any messages or any notes but in my disappointment, nothing came up. I wonder where the hell she could be at this hour. I went down to the cafeteria to see if she would be there eating an early breakfast but instead, I found myself munching through my own breakfast alone. She was no where to be found.

Maybe she was sick but that's probably a long shot since the last time I saw her, she felt fine. But I can't always be sure so I checked the clinic. Once I reached the clinic, I looked at the clock and saw that I only had 10 minutes before classes started. I asked the school nurse if she came in with some kind of sickness but the nurse only shook her head. This was hopeless. Where the hell could she be?

I couldn't waste any more time so I went in to my dorm and got my back pack and headed down the hall to where my locker was located. She wasn't there either. I was starting to feel really worried but at this moment, there was nothing else I could do so I just headed in to my first class.

The whole day, my mind wouldn't stop thinking about where she could be and why she wasn't in bed when I got up. I thought about why I couldn't find her and if she was starting to avoid me. Was she with someone else? Was it Matt? Was that why he was in her room last night? Anger raged inside of me as more and more thoughts about Matt and Natalie being together sprung inside my head. It was unbearable to think that your own friend would back stab you by being with your girlfriend knowing how much you love her.

I sighed heavily as the last period in the morning ended. Time flew by fast today and I don't even want to ask why. I just want to know where Natalie is. I never really cared this much about someone and I never really worried about someone like this. She brought this to me and now, she's no where to be found.

While I went to the cafeteria for lunch after visiting my locker, I got my phone and dialed her number. It rang several times and then led straight to voice mail.

"_Hey, this is Natalie and well, I'm not here right now so just leave me a message and I'll make sure I'll get back to you as soon as I can," _ her recorded voice said and was followed by a long beep.

I took a deep breath before saying anything. "Hey Natalie, where are you? This morning I woke up alone. Do you want to explain why that happened? And why aren't you in your classes? Just please call me as soon as you can." I felt kinda weird saying those things to her. It made me feel like I was responsible about her whereabouts. In shorter terms, it made me feel like I was her parent. But hearing that tone of anger in my voice just made me feel like an angry boyfriend.

I shrugged to myself before getting an empty table carrying my half full tray of food. I had quite an appetite for today so why not get more than usual? I was just eating in peace when suddenly one of my oldest friends, Luke, came near and sat himself down.

"You don't mind if I sit here do you?" he asked and I shook my head while I took a bite of the tuna turnover that was on my tray.

"You didn't hear did you?" he continued and I looked up at him.

"Hear what?" I asked with my mouth half full. Luckily, I didn't spit anything out.

"About Natalie," he said and almost spit the soda I sipped from the can.

"What about her?" I swallowed hard thinking that something might have happened to her. Wait, let me rephrase that. Something **bad** might have happened to her.

"She-" he started but then paused when he processed what kind of reaction I made. "I don't think you should hear this from me," he said and I rolled my eyes. Now that was just pathetic.

"Oh come on, I don't care who I hear it from," I said and he sighed before deciding to tell me.

"Well, the thing is that she transferred-"he said watching me closely as he spoke. I didn't want to interrupt so I just kept my mouth shut. "-people said that she wasn't really accustomed with the curriculum here but I didn't think that was why she transferred just after a week of being here. We hardly did anything." He said and somehow, my eyebrows met. A deep scowl was set on my face and well I didn't really have anything to say. Speechless at best.

"I'm really sorry man," he said patting my shoulder. I nodded in grief and just got up. So much for a big appetite.

"Excuse me for a sec," I said before leaving the cafeteria

I wanted to know if everything he said was real and this wasn't just a scam. I climbed about 6 flights of stairs just to check her room. When I got there with jagged breaths, I quickly opened the door just to see that her room was clean. Not one belonging of hers was left lying around in her room. Tears started welling up inside my eyes but they didn't flow all the way done. There was no reason for me to cry. She left, so what? It's not as if she wanted me to know so let's just say she's forgotten and that I don't know her anymore. She never entered my life and I couldn't care less about where the hell she might be. It's not that I hate her. To tell you the truth, I do love her but it's just easier not to care because if you didn't care, you'd be disappointed less. You wouldn't expect her to come back, you wouldn't expect her to care about what she left behind and well you wouldn't expect her to return your call.


	19. Chapter 19

[NATALIE'S POV]

Running away from your problems never solved them and for me, saying those things just makes me a hypocrite. I was afraid and I was scared. I needed some time away from everything and well here I am, alone and at home. My father picked me up after I told him that I couldn't keep up with the curriculum in the school he put me in. Calling him Dad for the first time felt weird at first but then I accepted it and now, it doesn't seem so awkward anymore. At least that's what I think.

My dad transferred me to this school near our house so it won't be such a hassle for me to come back on time. He has this weird time limits that I think will be somewhat unfair but unfortunately, I have to live with it. Because it's his house I'm living in, I have to live under his rules. Trust me, boarding school was a life saver but I don't think I can even complete the whole school year without enduring or going through so much pain. Even the first few weeks were painful. I guess it was because of my roommate and his grudge against my boyfriend.

So here I am, lying in my room waiting for all my stuff to be set in. My mother's at work and my father, well he only picked me up then dropped me off. He's heading to work right about now and well, I'm kinda alone. And I guess that's all I'll ever feel from now on. Oli called me in my cellphone 10 minutes ago. He left me a message which I was afraid to hear so I just deleted it. So much for beginning anew. Now I have to do it all over again even though I haven't even done much the last time I tried to begin again. But this time, I'll definitely make an effort. But somehow, I feel scared to leave everything behind. I never wanted my relationship with Oli to end like this. In fact, I never wanted it to end at all. Knowing that I won't ever be able to see him again is just heartbreaking but I did this to myself so if there's anyone to blame, it's me. I feel angry for all the things I've been through ever since I got here. Everything was in a fast pace and I just couldn't keep up. Life back at home was easier. This is just hectic and crazy.

I wandered around the house alone looking at all the new things I hadn't seen since I went to school. There were new frames up with my Mom and Dad in the portrait and somehow, I felt like an outcast for not being in that picture. I should've just visited my parents that Sunday because if I did, the thing that happened with Steven never would've occurred. Now, I just feel crazy for liking them both.

If you ask me about Oli, I'd tell you exactly why I like him but if you asked me about Steven, I don't think I can even say anything. It's indescribable, the way I feel for him. I don't even know why I like him. Was because of the sex? The way he looks perhaps? Something out or the ordinary? I just don't think I can answer you if you were to ask.

"What are you doing here?" my mother frightened me as soon as she saw me in the hallway.

"Hey mom," I said unhappily. It wasn't that I wasn't happy to see her. It was just that I felt all gloomy about the whole transfer without explanation thing. It sucks not being able to tell anyone but what's even dumber is that no one's telling me not to tell anyone. I just tell myself not to make a mess about the whole thing.

"Hello and you didn't answer my question," She said acting all mom-like by putting her hands on her waist.

"I'm transferring mom," I said walking towards her.

"Transferring?" She asked sounding confused.

"Didn't Dad tell you?" I asked her and she raised an eyebrow. "I know, I know, I'm still trying to get used to it." I said and she smiled.

"No," she said dropping the whole thing.

"So how was your day at work?" I asked her as we walked in to their room.

"It was quite stressful but it was fine," she sad and as she spoke, I noticed that she was starting to have an English accent. This was bad.

I shook the thought off and thought about another question. "What exactly do you do again?"

"I work in an office, dear." She said.

"Doing what?" I asked in not more than a split second.

"Well, I'm a secretary so paper work." She said taking her shoes off and heading in to their large closet. She changed in to some casual clothes and went to the bathroom.

I looked at the clock and noticed that it was only 3 in the afternoon. Wow, I wasted so much time in my room just lying around doing nothing.

My mother came out after a good 5 minutes and dragged me down to the living room.

"So where exactly is your dad transferring you?" she said sitting on the leather couch in front of the plasma TV.

"He said the nearest one from here," I said and my mother turned her full attention to me after switching on the television.

"The one where Matt goes to?" she asked and I shrugged. "I guess I don't have to worry about a thing after all." She said and began to watch this British soap. I sighed and then went in to the kitchen.

I felt kinda hungry so I fixed myself a sandwich. And as I ate it, I thought about the said "future". I thought about what might happen if I went to school with Matt. Of course, he'll start asking questions but what exactly should I tell him? That I transferred because I couldn't keep up? He'd think I was stupid. And what happens if he asks about Oli and Steven? Did he tell Oli about that encounter with Steven? Oh, I am so screwed. Frankly, I trusted Matt with all or maybe most of my secrets but can he really keep a secret? I know I shouldn't doubt him because he's a great friend and a fine gentleman and I know I can trust him but somehow, I just can't help it.

"Natalie?" a familiar voice said from the back door. Speak of the devil, it was Matt.

"Hey," I said not turning away from my now, half sandwich.

"What are you doing here?" he asked curiously as he sat on the stool right in front of me.

"Well, I should be asking you that question," I said bluntly pointing my sandwich at him.

He looked surprised as he acknowledged my reaction but the shrugged it off. "I'm just here because, apparently, your security system broke and both your parents are going out tonight." He said and I raised both my eyebrows.

"So you're what? A security guard?" I said stifling the laughter that wanted to burst out of my mouth. With the way I was acting, surely questions will pop in to people's head because I'm not like this. From my point of view, I think I might have insulted him a bit but I wasn't about to take it back.

I needed to push him away, far away so that Oli and I won't have a connection and so that he won't find out why I left. But one thing I'm worried about is when I push him far enough, is he going to open up the box that holds all my secrets and start headlines and tell the world? I can't have him do that so maybe I'll push him far away and then recoil.

From this point, you can practically tell that I'm no good at this. Not one bit.


	20. Chapter 20

[MATT'S POV]

It's been about a month or so since Natalie transferred to our school. One thing that's been quite different is the way she acts towards me. Every time I came by after school to just hang out with her, she goes in to her room and locks herself in. She hardly ever talks to me and she shuns me away as if I never meant anything to her. I hated this side of Natalie but if she needs her space then she might as well have it.

Our Thanksgiving break starts today meaning, more band practice and more invites from the Collins meaning more seeing Natalie and more shunning. Today, though, the whole band is coming over to my house for practice. We have a show coming in about two days and well we're all pretty stoked since this manager from a record company is going to come see us. And if we get signed, we'll start touring before school ends and that's just awesome.

"Matt! Your friends are here!" my mum called out from downstairs.

"I'll be right down!" I replied and got out of my room and slid down the rail of the stair case.

"Hey guys," I greeted as we all proceeded down the stairs and to the basement.

We started practice as soon as our feet reached the small stage. Oli was acting all moody and angry and he really didn't want to waste time. We didn't want any trouble with him so we gave in to his wishes and started to practice. While we took the pretend stage, I noticed that Oli was more like screaming out of tune then in it. I know in our kind of music, it usually didn't matter but he was singing way off key. The other band members and I exchanged looks every now and then with our eyebrows all furrowed and shrugging shoulders. But either way we still kept playing so Oli wouldn't have to stop and take his anger out on us. We didn't need to mess things up. We just needed to practice.

Band practice went on for about an hour or so until Oli suggested to take a break. We all just went with the flow and fooled around in the basement. Curtis, Matt K., and Lee all started playing with the Xbox 360. Oli was sitting on the couch with his hands on his face. He was facing down and he placed his elbows on his thighs for support.

"What's up man?" I asked a bit hesitantly as I sat right beside him.

"Nothing," he said bluntly as he sat up.

"It doesn't seem like nothing," I said and he looked up at me with one of his eyebrows cocked up.

"C'mon man, I need my space." He demanded.

"Dude, cut the alibis and tell me what's up," I said demanding right back at him. He looked at me twice before speaking.

"It's about Natalie, okay?" he said with an exasperated sigh.

"What about her?" I asked him and somehow his expression softened.

"It's just that I miss her so much you know and she left without saying anything to me and ever since that day, she never ever called me back or messaged me. Not a single word was spoken since that day. I tried to forget her and say that she really doesn't matter anymore but it can't be helped. She changed me and when she left, I got so lost. I didn't know where I was and I didn't know what to do. I was and am still clueless after everything that happened. It just sucks to know that she left without a single word. I mean it would've been way easier for me if she just told me exactly why she left but I guess not everyone gets what they want." He said leaning back on the couch.

"So you don't know why she left?" I asked him innocently.

"Nope, I was actually planning to ask you," he said and my eyes almost popped out.

He raised an eyebrow at my expression. "She hasn't told me why yet because she never really talked to me since. She's ignoring me for some reason and well I just let her." I explained and he scratched the back of his head.

"It's just-" he paused. "She's just not like all the other girls I've dated you know, she's quite different in a special way and it's not just because she's from another country." He said thoughtfully.

"I hear ya," I said and he looked at me with this weird expression and I just shrugged at him and he shook his head.

"I just don't know what to do," he said.

Somehow, I didn't want to leave the conversation at that. I wanted to tell him something he didn't know but I wasn't in the right shoes to do that. I'd hate to make him even worse or miserable. He didn't deserve to hear it from me so he might as well just wait for her to tell him.

"If you know something, tell me okay?" he said and he got up telling the band to take five and start practicing again.

Something in me told me to just blurt it all out and part of me told my other half to keep its mouth shut. I couldn't help but feel guilty about all this but if this plays out well then it's probably a good thing to keep to myself. As I sat on my chair holding my drum sticks I tried to push all those mixed up thoughts out of my head and seriously, they were killing me inside. I didn't really play well because of it but the rest were too preoccupied to notice so I guess you can call me lucky. Well I'm not all around lucky, I just like to think I am. Practically, one of the reasons why I think I'm lucky is because I have friends who trust me. And to be trusted with Oli, that's something big because he doesn't really spit his problems out. He just keeps them all inside so I guess him telling me is surprising.

All these thoughts started shredding my brain and all those little chunks started to heat up and suddenly, I burst in to flames.

**"She slept with Steven!"**

Man, was this going to be one hell of a day.


	21. Chapter 21

[OLI'S POV]

"What?!" I said as shock raced through my veins.

Was I dreaming or was this real? I mean did I really hear him right or was I just hallucinating? This was absurd and quite weird. But I just hope it was nothing. I looked at Matt with my eyes wide open and he asked me to walk outside with him. I agreed with him about the walk but I was nervous at the same time. I didn't know why thought but I just was.

Once we got out of the house and out of hearing distance, Matt started explaining. He told me that Natalie had told him about that Sunday she spent alone because I was out visiting my parents back home. As he spoke, rage started to fill me up and I started to breathe raggedly. Now this isn't just because I have a condition, the reason behind the ragged breathing is the anger I have in me. This happens when I get super furious. I was sorta ready to take Steven down and talk to Natalie and ask her why she hadn't told me about this sooner.

"I think that's it," Matt said as we started to walk back towards his house.

"I can't believe this," I said and sighed. I looked down at the pavement as I walked.

"She didn't want you to get hurt, Oli," he told me and patted my back.

"So let me get this straight," I said and looked up at Matt who was looking at the houses we passed as we walked down the sidewalk. "She wanted to have sex with him?" I asked him inappropriately. He looked at me with a look I couldn't decode and then looked in front of him.

"More or less yea, that's what she told me." He said sympathetically.

"So she cheated on me and Steven didn't rape her." I stated trying to tell myself that yes, she ditched me for that son of a bitch.

"Yes, Oli, that's what she said." He said reassuringly. For some reason, he was being extra patient with me today. I wonder why.

"That's just…" I trailed off.

"Crazy," Matt said finishing my statement.

"Exactly," I agreed.

We walked back inside the house and resumed band practice. We ended at around 4 P.M. or so and well once I exited the house, I knew that I had to confront her so I walked up to her house and knocked on her front door. I knocked three times before someone opened the door.

"Why, hello there, Oli," Mrs. Sanders said with a welcoming tone. I greeted her back and she let me in.

She called Natalie from her room and asked me to wait in their large living room. I decided to just stand up there since I wanted this to be quick. I wanted to be precise and brief so I won't make a big mess. I knew what I had to do and I knew that if I didn't do it, then I'd only torment myself with more pain. But once she went down the stairs and once Mrs. Sanders went back up to give us some space, I totally lost it not in a psychological way but what I mean is that everything I planned to do just vanished in my head.

She stood there looking at me with one eyebrow raised up and her arms crossed over her chest. Obviously, she was waiting for me to speak but I couldn't get past the ball in my throat that stopped all the words from flowing out. My body was malfunctioning and my brain went blank which was bad in situations like these. She sighed at me and was about to turn away and leave but luckily, I grabbed her wrist as gentle as possible before she I let her walk away again.

"Wait," I finally managed to say. She turned around to face me and I let go of her wrist. I was fully in control of my actions now meaning that this was something I could definitely do.

"Why didn't you just tell me about it?" I asked her and she avoided eye contact. She looked away from me and looked at some of the things in their living room. She didn't say anything at all and it was clear to me now that she was giving me the silent treatment. I really couldn't get anything out of her no matter how hard I tried. She was too difficult and it turns out what I came here to do was quite impossible.

"Even just one word?" I pleaded and suddenly the look on her face changed.

She sighed before she spoke. "I can't do this Oli, I'm sorry," she said and then she started to walk away.

"So you never loved me? Is that it?" I asked and she stopped in her tracks. She spun to face me and I noticed that her eyes were starting to tear up.

"I loved you Oli," she said as she looked into my eyes.

"But?" I said asking her to continue. She can't just leave it like that.

"But what I did was unforgivable so I did you a favor and stayed away. I was hoping you'd understand but apparently you don't." she said. I think that was the longest statement she uttered ever since I got here.

"But why didn't you just tell me? We could've gotten through it," I said not really sure if I wanted to make up or part ways with her.

"We could've but I don't think I could have lived with it." She said as tears started streaming down her face. I wanted to just run to her and hold her but I had to hold myself back.

"Natalie-"

"Oli, I don't think it's going to work out. I think this is it." She croaked out. She started to sob now.

I started towards her and stood right in front so that we were only inches apart. I stroked her cheek with my thumb and wiped away her tears.

"That's going to work," she said pushing my hand away gently.

"But our relationship will. I promise you that." I said and she looked up at me in disbelief.

I held her in my arms and was willing to give her a second chance. I don't know why though but I just had this feeling that I just needed to give her another try. It's too soon to give up now. I just hope and wish that I'm not just setting a re-run of everything that has happened to me.

"Are you sure?" she said sniffling.

"Yes," I said and smiled.

I never wanted to let her go and I just hope she feels the same way about me too. I know that I came here to just end it with her but I can't. Maybe if I did end it, I would ruin the chances of having newer experiences which I want to go through with her. Practically, she's my world and I just want to be with her every damn second of every minute of every day. It may sound corny but I know it's true.


	22. Chapter 22

[OLI'S POV]

Thanksgiving was over and we all had to go back to our separate schools. I didn't like the separation between Natalie and I. I wanted her back in her room where I could sneak in and just be with her every morning, night and practically every chance I get to spend with her. So the last time I snuck in to her room – since I snuck in there practically every night of the break – we had a little fun of our own. The walls were thick and no one was able to hear us since her parents were out. They didn't come back until like four in the morning and unusually, we were still up at that time so once they came, we quickly wore the garments we tore off of each other and I went out the window after a long, sweet kiss that I was sure to miss once I was far away from her.

So when the day came, I visited her in the late afternoon before I went back to school and spent every minute of the time left with her lips on mine. Her parents weren't in the house again so we were free from getting caught or anything embarrassing like that. We talked a little once our lips were more or less swollen from all the kissing and nibbling and all in all I had a great time with her. We talked about how we were going to miss each other and how school would be without either one in it and all that goodbye crap. I hated goodbyes but sadly I was going to make one until summer but this wasn't really a goodbye, it was more of a farewell because I knew that we were both bound to see each other again someday.

"So what do you want to do now?" I asked her after one long talk.

"Hmmm, I want ice cream." She said and smiled. Man, was I gonna miss that.

"Okay," I said and we both walked out of the house hand in hand.

We walked to the nearest ice cream place which was like 5 blocks away from her house but I didn't care. The really far walk gave us more time to spend with each other. While we walked, we laughed at some of the things that happened over the break and talked more about last night and how we almost got caught. We entered the shop laughing and caught the attention of some people inside the shop. They might think that we were crazy but hell, I didn't care. So what if that's what they think? We were two people in love and not everybody can get that feeling in their lives so they should just let us be.

While we were walking to this ice cream place, I forgot to mention something to her. This was actually where Steven worked during breaks. I know it's a lame job but you actually earn a lot here. I would know because I myself used to work here once upon a time. It was too late to turn back now so we just went in and walked over to the counter so we could get what we wanted to eat.

"Why hello there," Steven said as we approached his station.

I really wanted to grab a knife and stab him right then and there because of the way he was staring at Natalie up and down. I felt very protective of her and trust me, I'd do anything just to protect her. I'd kill and commit a crime if it was necessary.

Natalie didn't really say anything so she just looked up at me. I didn't know what I was supposed to say so I just looked up at the menu to see what I wanted. "One scoop of caramel chocolate in a cup and-" I paused to see what she wanted.

"One scoop of chili chocolate on a cone for me," Natalie ordered and Steven typed it all down. I paid for everything and he looked at me as if I did something wrong.

"Where'd you get all this money? From the trash where you came from?" he said with a bitter laugh.

"I earn it daddy's boy. Unlike you, I actually know how to spend my money." I said keeping it calm even if all my nerves were already urging my fist to strike a punch and make a scene.

He scoffed at my statement and got what we ordered. I just told myself to let it go for the sake of everyone in this store. There were too many kids in here and parents from the same village Natalie lived in. It was too risky to make a scene now but if it was necessary.

"Why how do I spend money?" he asked when he came back and set the orders on the counter.

"On strippers and alcohol," I said casually and his eyes popped out and he looked at Natalie and she looked at him in disgust. He was ashamed of that but he couldn't deny it.

I wanted to let it all go now that he was silent and for once I had the last word but sadly, my ego wouldn't let me.

"I bet the day you fucked her, you were nothing but a horny bastard who looked at her as if she was a prostitute," I said and that really got him.

"You so didn't say that," he said jumping to the other side of the counter and I stepped back to avoid getting kicked in the face.

"Hey! You two! If you wanna fight, go take it outside!" One dad called out from the far side of the place.

Apparently, we were as loud as he was being right now. We looked around us and saw that everyone went silent and watched us as we blew each other's minds off verbally. He rolled his eyes and entered the back room and I looked at Natalie who smiled weakly at me. We both exited the scene with the ice cream in our hands and walked home in pure silence.

I knew she was angry or sad or depressed and I knew that what I said was really uncalled for but I didn't really know why I couldn't just let it go like other people would have. I just had to say it all out loud.

"I'm sorry about what happened," I finally said once we reached the front door.

"It's okay," she said softly.

I smiled at her and she smiled back. Her parents' car was already in the garage meaning I couldn't get in anymore so I kissed her one last time before I left.

Once I walked away, I thought about what happened and knew that this wasn't over with Steven yet. It was just a brand new beginning and this time, we had something real to fight and rumble about.


	23. Chapter 23

[OLI'S POV]

6 MONTHS LATER

I went back to school really early in the morning at about 6 A.M. I wasn't able sleep last night so there was no point in wasting time. Once I reached the place, I noticed that a lot of kids were already up and about. School does start at 7 but I didn't really think people would get up this early. I didn't know why I was back here in school. I told myself I'd flunk it and go on with the band. My parents couldn't care less but for some reason, I felt that I had some kind of unfinished business to deal with in the walls of this school. I was going to graduate high school today and there was no point in getting expelled now but I couldn't take this fiery tension anymore. I knew that I had to strike a punch. Every bone in my body told me so. It had been a while since that day in the ice cream shop and I just couldn't let it go. With everything that has happened, I couldn't help but get angry at everything. The band's been doing great with my mood but Natalie didn't like it one bit. She told me that I had to stop holding grudges and just let go but I'm a stubborn fool so letting go is not in my vocabulary.

I sat through the whole program and waited til the end of it. Steven was there with all the big smiles as he won awards only a nerd would have won and I couldn't help but sneer at the very sight of him. I received my diploma through fake smiles as my parents took pictures. I went down the platform and back to my seat but this time I noticed as I looked to the side that someone was coming. Someone with a slim figure and dark brown hair in a black dress with heels was starting to come towards me. The whole program was over and everyone threw their graduation caps in the air but I just took mine off and walked towards the female who had been walking towards me and noticed as I walked and looked closer that it was my girlfriend. I ran to her and lifted her off the ground as soon as I could.

"Hey, what are you doing here?" I asked her as I set her on the ground.

"Congratulations," she said crashing her lips on mine. I kissed her back and placed my hands on her waist.

We both had our graduation on the same day so I wasn't expecting her to be here. I expected her to be at her own school getting her own diploma.

"Congratulations to you too," I said pulling her in to a hug.

My parents came towards us and congratulated both of us and then told me that they were off to some place I didn't know and wouldn't be back til September. At this I was shocked because they chose to tell me only now. I bade them goodbye and they threw a set of keys at me.

"Congrats, sweetie." My mother said and she winked as they left.

I couldn't believe it. They gave me the keys to the Bentley. The really awesome Bentley that they had told me never to use. I showed what I had received to Natalie and she was just as excited as I was. We both checked it out as we walked to the parking lot. I could tell that it was mine because there was a big red bow on top and it had a card saying:

_To: Oliver Sykes _

_From: Mum and Dad_

I took the bow out before I checked everything out as if it hadn't been in our house for so long. Man, was I excited. I placed my toga in the back seat and went over to the passenger side to open the door for my girlfriend. Then I ran around the front to get on my side of the car so I could rev up the nice engine that was installed in this vehicle. But before I could fully experience a ride, Steven stood right in front of the car and tried to look through the dark tint of the car. I got out of my side of the car right after Natalie had specifically told me not to and I told her to stay inside the car.

Here comes the action.

I shut the door and cocked my head to side to ask him what he wanted.

"Nice ride, Sykes." He said in a not so pleased kinda way. He said it as if he meant the total opposite.

"What's your problem, Asher?" I asked him in the same tone.

"You," he said walking towards me. I stood as still as a rock.

"What about me?" I asked acting all clueless.

"Look, it's not over yet, nimrod." He said pushing me but I didn't move one bit.

"Nimrod?" I laughed at his use of words.

This he grew really angry at. He struck a punch but that I saw it coming so I evaded from it and got him good in the gut but I didn't stop there. I took another punch and hit him in the nose and that's when blood came streaming out.

"Is it over now?" I taunted at him as he rolled in pain on the asphalt.

I watched him groan and showed no mercy. I kicked him once more in the stomach and watched as blood oozed out of his mouth. This day couldn't get any better.

Once I was done with him and all my anger just went away at the sight of his agony, I rolled away with my Bentley.

The whole ride going back to Natalie's house was spent in silence. Somehow I couldn't care less about anything anymore. I was too full with my pride that I was trapped in my own world. When she went down and out of my car, I didn't even bother tell her goodbye. I just drove off right after she shut the door.

I drove to the venue we were supposed to perform in today and let it all out.


	24. Chapter 24

"I can't deal with all this anymore." Natalie said on the phone.

I didn't get it. I was hungover from the after party last night. I couldn't decipher her words at all. So since I couldn't process what she said, I just put the phone beside me and I just left it there unattended. After a minute, she hung up and I went back to sleep. Just so you know, I live in an apartment now and it has only been a week since the graduation. No Steven, nothing to worry about. Natalie wasn't the same person I thought she was. Well at least that's what I think. All I've been doing since I've graduated college was fooling around and not giving a fuck about the world around me. I've been standing on the edge for so many nights and days now and I don't think I'd ever want to come down.

It was twelve o'clock on my watch and my headache was starting to disappear. Meaning it was time to get up and start a brand new day. Once I took a quick shower – since I haven't taken one in days – I put on my clothes and checked out my phone while heading to the kitchen.

There were several messages and I checked every single one of them but none of them mattered as much as the one I received from Natalie. She told me through text that she wanted out of our relationship. She was getting tired of all the shit I did and she couldn't stand my ego. It's not really my fault, is it? I mean if she doesn't want me to be me then who else should I be? I told her through text that she could have it her way and that I didn't care because I seriously didn't anymore. She was overreacting and that was sorta clear. I was careless and as of this moment, I was free. High school relationships never really worked out anymore after high school I mean if they did, then that would totally disrupt its whole purpose.

Once I sent the message, she replied almost instantly. She told me how much of a jerk I am and blah, blah, blah. It went on and on but I didn't bother to read anything she said. I just closed the message as soon as I received it. Maybe once I'm in a better mood to deal with all this bullshit then I'd do something about it but right now I just didn't care at all. She could go run into Asher's arms for all I care. She was just another girl. She was nothing to be and she never will be. I'll get over her.

I spent the whole day lying to myself as I went out with the guys. We were looking for someone to sign us up so we could be real stars and rock practically the whole world. That was my dream ever since I was a young boy. I used to love screaming songs in the bathroom and not giving a fuck about anything anyone says. I was always a careless kid and that got me here, right where I wanted to be. I've never cared about anything until Natalie came. She made me feel like there was more to the world than stardom and fame. She taught me that love rules over all but now, all she taught somehow vanished from my head and my carelessness shined right back in. I liked this feeling. It was familiar and well known to me. Contrary to all that love shit, this was the best feeling I've ever felt. I never want the feeling to escape me ever again.

We auditioned for a few producers but only one of them signed us; that record was called Thirty Days of Night Records. We were so psyched about it and couldn't wait for the rest of the world to hear our songs and watch us express ourselves on stage. I was finally getting my dream. We were going to tour the whole world and we were going to have millions of records and billions of awards which all result to more money. This was all going so well for me but I inside, I couldn't help but fall apart. Not because I was leaving this place – God, knows that's all I ever wanted – but because the most perfect thing in my life just burned to the ground before me and I didn't even dare to put the fire out and save it. I was stupid. No wait let me rephrase that. I am stupid. I don't get my thoughts out straight and I don't keep my thoughts to myself. I don't let my feelings go easily and well that's just a few of my plenty flaws. She made me feel best when I was in my worst. She lifted me off the ground every time I felt like I was stuck in a ditch. She made the world seem like it was revolving around both of us. I can't believe I just let it all go. Seem quite ironic since I'm someone who never really lets things go easily. I had been such an asshole to everyone around me and well I'm starting to regret it. I wish I could just turn myself around and restart my life. Tell myself to care more about everything that sustains my life. But I never really thought about it 'til now but I guess it's not too late now, is it?

I called her after contemplating on life. She didn't pick up which was really what I expected so I left her a message of everything I just realized. If she wasn't going to take me back I totally understood but I just…I just want her back with me so we could spend a whole life being together. I pictured the both of us sitting on the front porch of what will be our house as soon as we become successful but I won't be satisfied until a smile on her face.

Realizing these things made me think. It made me think very hard. Am I bipolar or something? Is something wrong with me? I mean I thought I told myself not to care about all this crap. Man, am I confused. Fuck all this shit. I can't believe this was actually bothering me. It's like I have two of me inside my body.

She didn't call me back. I waited for hours and she did nothing. I guess now would be a good time to check out those messages then. I checked out her first message and she told me that I never really listened to her anymore and that she thought that she was wasting her time with me. She said that she should never have fallen for me and that she wished she could erase her memories.

Just a quick reality check, she's free now, right? I mean she has her own place and she's in college taking up some kind of course. She told me that she didn't want a dorm so I helped her find a place somewhere near her college. So that's where I started to go. I told everyone that I was going home early and they were all too buzzed to care. I drove around in my car for a while before going to her place. I needed some time to think about what I was supposed to tell her. What was I supposed to do when she would shut the door in my face? Man, I have to figure this all out quickly. So once I did, I drove to her apartment building. I was ready. I knew it by heart.


	25. Chapter 25

My heart was pumping faster now. I was five steps away from her door. I parked my car right outside so that I could drive away quickly if ever this all goes wrong. My palms were shaking and I was sweating out on a cold day. How weird is that? I stepped up to her door and knocked slowly but loud enough for her to hear from the inside. No one answered and I've been here only for a minute. I was getting impatient and I just wanted to get this over with. I couldn't stand not seeing her face. Actually, in all honesty, I couldn't stand any of this at all. I sighed before holding on to the door knob. I twisted it slowly and noticed that it was unlocked. I barged in as soon as the door opened. She wasn't home and she didn't lock her door on the way out. Something must be wrong.

I checked the whole place out and noticed how cluttered some things were. She hadn't tidied up. She was a mess and she wasn't home. I checked her room and saw this photo album lying on her bed. Her pillow was wet and I saw red spots on the sheet. The mirror had been smashed into pieces and there was a post it on her dresser. It said that whoever found it should just get out of the house and drown himself or herself in happiness since they could spend the rest of their lives with one less messed up girl to worry about. This sounded bad. I tried to think about where she might have gone but my mind was spinning to fast for me to process all this in. Tears were streaming down faster than the rain that had started to pour outside. Was she gone? Will this be the only things that would remind me of her? Where was she? Is she okay? Is she still breathing? How can she think about killing herself when she's got so much to live for? I never knew I was her only hope. And I'm sorry. I don't know why I did this to her but if she killed herself because of me, I don't think I'll ever be able to forgive myself. So instead of doing nothing – for there might still be hope – I tried to think hard about where she might've gone. Then it popped in my head like a bubble. I knew where she was and if I'm not mistaken, she's in that place we called ours during Christmas where we watched the waves crash on the shore below us.

It was a really high cliff that showed a vast view of what I'm guessing is an ocean. She told me that it was beautiful and we stayed there in silence as we held each other's hands. Well of course that was like my pre-idiot days where I did actually care for her. I call those days the best days of my life. I would never have been the same without them. I loved it when I held her in my arms and I loved when I would spend practically the whole day just listening to her talk about what she wanted to do with her life and that's why I just couldn't let her waste her life away. I had to get there and fast.

I got into my car and stepped on it as I drove through the outskirts of town. I only had so much time left before she would be gone. Who knows how long she's been there? It's raining and it's cold. It would be the perfect scene really to attempt suicide, you know with all the dramatic crap. But I wasn't going to let her go through with it. It's irrational and stupid to die because of what I did. But I guess I'm just saying this because I don't want to feel guilty for the rest of my life. Well not only that but I seriously don't want to lose her. Not like this. Not when she has so much ahead of her.

No stoplight prevented me from getting to her any quicker. Luckily, there were no police cars chasing me down. The tears finally stopped as I reached the 'place'. I ran past all the green pastures and didn't care about my car that was parked on the wrong lane. I hopped over logs and ran in the rain trying so hard not to slip and fall on the mud that was on the ground. Once I was on the edge of the cliff, I saw her on the other end. She had blood in her hands coming from her wrists. I never knew she was suicidal. I guess I never really did listen. How could I have been so selfish?

It took every ounce of courage in me not to scream to catch her attention because if I did scream, she would totally jump headfirst into the water. I didn't want that. I didn't want any of this to happen. But it is happening and right now watching her as she watches the waves crash below with blood dripping on the ground, my tears washed away with the guilt that started filling me in. I ran to her and brought her away from the edge. I didn't have that much strength to keep her from screaming. I just held her in my arms as she tried to break away from me. She knew that it was me and she started saying things about how I didn't care and that I was just here to protect myself. I didn't answer or budge. I didn't want to let her go. The rain started to slow and she started to calm herself down but then she started crying and that's when I loosened my grip. I thought she was going to be alright now but I was wrong instead, she got up and ran across the cliff and jumped over the edge.

"Natalie!!" I screamed after her.

I didn't know what else to do so I jumped in after her. It was a long way down and the water was cold. Wait, let me rephrase that. It was freezing. Natalie hit her head on a rock and was going down quick. Luckily, I took swimming lessons as a child or else we'd both be doomed. I took a deep breath before going in after her. She was losing too much blood and the water was slowing me down. I swear I could just die of hypothermia. I grabbed her hand as soon as I reached it and brought her up. I swam to the shore and once we were on land, I carried her all the way up to where my car was. I tried my hardest not to fear her death but I couldn't help it. I kept chanting in my head as I drove to the hospital. I told myself that she was going to be okay and that it was all going to be fine. Time wouldn't slow down no matter how much I wanted it to.

I broke all the road rules possible and had one police car chasing me down but all I did was speed up. The next hospital was now a block away. Once I reached the hospital, I just left my car by the entrance and carried Natalie in my arms as I went into the lobby.

"Somebody help me!" I screamed catching everybody's attention.

Doctors and nurses brought out a crash cart as soon as they saw the girl in my arms, the one who was slowly dying. They rushed her in an emergency room as I broke down crying in the ward. I couldn't do anything that made sense. I didn't call anyone. I didn't speak or tell anyone what happened. But if she dies here in this very hospital, I'm dying with her.


	26. Chapter 26

I think I might've slept through the night. I didn't know what time it was anymore when I got up but when I took in the scenery and realized exactly where I was, I shot up instantly and ran to where Natalie was currently recovering. She's alive, she's breathing, and she is still here. I could never have been more relieved or happier right now. There was still a chance and hope was still in my side.

The monitors told me that her heart was beating steadily and that sound just calmed me in a way I could probably never forget. I sat on the chair beside her bed and got close enough to hold her hand. I grazed it with my thumb and caressed her hand which was now wrapped in gauze. But even with all this calm, the guilt was still there. I felt it lingering somewhere in the room and there was really nothing I could do about it.

I haven't spoken since the accident even when the doctor's asked me about what happened because I felt that if I did speak, I'd only be saying the wrong things, answering his question the wrong way. My emotions were all messed up to the point where I didn't really know what I was feeling but at least now, the doctor's got the message and kept away from me because obviously, I was of no help to them.

With all this thinking that was going on in my head, it took me a long time to notice that Natalie was awake and she was looking at me. Tears soaked her pillow and her grasp tightened just a little. Obviously that big jump she made weakened her. But even in this state, there was no way I could deny that I was still in love with her.

"I'm so sorry," I whispered leaning closer so she could hear me properly.

My throat felt really dry and I was starting to feel a little dizzy.

Instead of answering me, she simply shook her head and looked away but she left her hand in mine with the same strength in her grasp. She sniffed her tears away and then looked back at me. But even while she was trying to hold back her tears, they just kept falling.

Her puffy eyes looked straight into mine as she mouthed one word: 'Why?'

She seemed devastated and angry for some reason and well I just didn't get it. Well, yeah, apparently her plan didn't work but it was actually a good thing. I mean there's always a bright side to everything right? So why couldn't she see the bright side in all of this?

I swallowed hard before answering her but not even my saliva helped this time. So instead of giving her a sermon about how I felt, I just simply showed her. I gave her a kiss, gentle and soft. I didn't want to hurt her physically so I pulled away after one short kiss. I looked at her feeling her warmth as I stopped only inches away from her face.

"That's why," I stated briefly and she tried to fight the smile that was making its way to her face but I still saw it. It was there and that's when I knew that I could still give her bits of happiness even in times like this and in reality that was all that really mattered.

I gave her time to process everything. I told her I'll be right back and went into the cafeteria that the hospital had and bought myself a bottle of water. I twisted the cap as soon as I paid for it and I drank the contents quickly. After which, I made my way back to the room and saw her trying to get up from her bed.

"Hey, don't strain yourself," I told her as I walked briskly to her bed and pushed her down gently.

"I shouldn't be here," she told me with some kind of dark shade in her tone.

"I don't know what you mean," I said taking a seat beside on the chair beside the bed.

"I mean…" she paused to gather some thoughts, "that jump was supposed to mean goodbye and well I messed up everything in my room," she said and well I had to laugh at that.

"You survived a really big fall and that's what you're thinking about?" I asked rhetorically. She smiled and well, maybe it was all going to be okay from here.

"Well who's going to pay for the damages then?" she asked me as she bit on the bottom part of her lip.

"We'll figure that out when you get out of here, together." I said reaching for her face and rubbed her cheek.

She placed her hand on mine and held it against her cheek. She looked at me and I looked at her and almost simultaneously, we both smiled. She then let go of my hand and scooted over to the side and patted the space beside her telling me to lie next to her.

"Natalie, you should know by now that I love you." I told her as she placed her head – which was partially bandaged – against my chest.

She kept silent urging me to go on. So I did, "I wouldn't let anything happen to you and you should also know by know that if you need anything, I'm here for you. Don't hesitate to call on me. I'll be there for you."

"But how was I supposed to know that?" she asked me and then all the bad memories I thought I had locked inside my head came rushing out. It was as if I was seeing a live play reiterating exactly what happened before the accident.

I held her tightly before saying anything else. "I know, I was stupid and full of myself and I took you for granted but I can assure you that it won't happen again. I won't let it. I can't let it. After I called you and noticed that you didn't answer, I got in my car and rushed to your place and with the way it looked inside told me that something had to be wrong and-"

"But how did you know exactly where I was?" she asked cutting me off.

"Because I remember, Natalie. I couldn't just forget and when I saw your apartment, I don't know I guess it was just an instinct." I said playing with her hair. _Just like the old times_.

"Well I guess now I'm glad I survived." She said and I looked down at her. "I mean I thought you lost it, Oli. I thought you'd never be the same again after all the fame. I thought I was just another thing that was in your way. I felt like such a tool and it just didn't feel right."

"I'm sorry," it was all I could say, really. And no matter how many times I try to apologize, it won't change what happened, I know that but maybe this could be an obstacle or a bump in the road. I'm just happy I got through it.

We talked for hours. We talked until the doctor told me that I had to give her some time to rest. So I got off the bed and then the doctor went out. She smiled at me before closing her eyes. She was smiling with her eyes closed and if you don't think it's a good thing then maybe you should go get a check up or something because with that conclusion, I can tell that something's totally wrong with your head. I'm no doctor or anything but I can make sure I can cure her sadness and make her feel great. Wait let me rephrase that. I know I can cure her sadness and make it go away forever. I'll promise to always be there forever and as of now, I'm a man of my word so I'll never turn on it no matter what happens.


	27. Chapter 27

[NATALIE'S POV]

When I was discharged from the hospital, Oli and I went back to my apartment to clean up the mess I made. We made plans while we packed the rest of the stuff up. We were getting an apartment all to ourselves. Some place to call our own. We were old enough to own an apartment and pay the bills so why not, right?

We got an apartment all to ourselves. It was perfect for both of us. There were two bedrooms but we decided to use just one for the both of us and then the other would be for guests or maybe one of the guys from the band, you know if ever they need a place to stay.

It's been a week since we found this place and we were both happy and glad to be together. But I still wondered though about what might have happened if I did jump off of that cliff. Would I have survived if he didn't jump after me?

When I thought about jumping over board, I guess you can say it wall a bit over dramatic but maybe, if I didn't think about doing what I did, Oli would still be the same and he wouldn't have a breakthrough or anything like that. But then again, maybe I'm not reading him right. He did call me back after I called him. But until now, I never asked him about what that call was about because somehow, deep inside, I think I always knew.

Everyday now, he reminds me that he loves me and that he'll never let me go and fortunately, I'm starting to really believe him. Oli changed a lot after what happened. He's extra careful with what he says, he treats me way better and he makes time for me even when he's really busy with the band and stuff. He calls me a lot during the day just to ask me what I was doing. I love that he's back on the right path. The same path I saw him on the first time we met and although things have changed, I will still remember everything and not regret a single bit of the life we made together.

I've learned to look at things from a new perspective and even though there are moments where I thought that I was somewhat stupid or quite embarrassing, I just shrug it off knowing that there was a reason to that and that if that single moment never happened, I would have never ended up here in this apartment in Oli's arms.

I looked up to Oli – who was currently watching the movie called The School of Rock – thinking about how lucky and blessed I was to have a guy like him in my life. Everyday was a new story with him and with each passing day, I realize how lucky I am to be alive.

Every single day, I open my eyes the very second sunlight seeps through the window sills excited to see what the day holds for me. I've never been more excited about life since. Even though it all might seem very routine to other people, to me, it's another surprise in a box waiting to pop out.

I fell into a deep slumber as I breathe in the scent of him knowing that this moment could last forever and knowing that he'll always be there for me.

[OLI'S POV]

She slept soundly in my arms but held me tightly and somehow, I put it into my head that she was the one. The one person who I see myself spending my life with. The one who would probably still be my side as I grow old and die. She was the one I needed in my life. It was a cold, hard and true fact.

The day we met seemed like yesterday and the rest of the memories we had together seemed like something we did in a past life. I've never met anyone like her and knowing that she'll always be my side, I'm sure I'll never meet anyone else who's just like her in most every way. No one can ever replace her.

To live my life with a purpose always seemed like a dream to me but when I met her, I realized that it was not a dream that seemed so far but a goal that I was aiming to reach. She was the reason for this life I was living. It all seemed so perfect and cliché in a way but somehow, it doesn't seem like something other people feel. It all felt so new to me. Something unique and something so unreal. But it was real. It wasn't a mere fantasy that I had going on in my head. I was holding her and she was here in my arms where I promised to keep her safe. We were together and in some way I know that we'll be together for eternity.

Now I know eternity seems like a long time but with her, I can wait forever.


End file.
